


As Dreamers Do

by hero_hero



Series: Foxbody [3]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Animals, Astronomy, Constellations, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fox!Jeongin, Friends to Lovers, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Minho is the moon, Slow Burn, Suicidal Thoughts, jisung is the sun, this is a mess AGAIN
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-14
Updated: 2020-03-14
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:08:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23145202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hero_hero/pseuds/hero_hero
Summary: In which Jeongin learns a little bit more about Woojin’s past, how to be human, and how to deal with being in love with his best friend.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Kim Woojin, Hwang Hyunjin & Yang Jeongin | I.N, Hwang Hyunjin/Yang Jeongin | I.N, Kim Seungmin/Lee Felix, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Series: Foxbody [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1641826
Comments: 60
Kudos: 167





	As Dreamers Do

**Author's Note:**

> Alright WOW okay the first half of this did NOT age well. I am...so sorry.
> 
> And oh boy, if you thought the last few parts were emotional, you ain’t seen nothin' yet! That being said, there are some heavy themes discussed in this, so if you’re really struggling with any mental illnesses, please proceed with caution.
> 
> As always this is unbeta'd and there are probably loads of typos and plot holes so...please just ignore those for now haha.
> 
> Title from "When You Wish Upon a Star" from Disney's Pinocchio

The early morning sunlight streamed through the open window, drifting peacefully across the room until it settled upon the sleeping face of a certain individual.

And then the sunlight shattered that peacefulness by shouting, “RISE AND SHINE, YA LITTLE SHIT!”

Jeongin jolted awake, only to be immediately blinded by the sunlight hitting him directly from the window. He made some sort of whiny, inhuman, groaning noise and rolled over.

“You’re gonna be even more late for work if you don’t get up,” Jisung said. “Up, up, up!”

Jeongin responded by pulling his blankets over his head.

“Don’t make me get Felix,” Jisung said. “I can and I will!”

“Go away,” Jeongin whined. “Let me sleep all day.”

“Nope, because responsibilities are a thing! C’mon, up!”

Jeongin was suddenly so grateful that Jisung didn’t have a human form, because otherwise he would be launching himself onto Jeongin’s bed and jumping up and down on it to get Jeongin up.

“Five more minutes,” Jeongin said.

Jisung heaved a great, dramatic sigh. “Oh, _alright_.” Then he fell silent.

“Thank you,” Jeongin whispered, mostly to himself or to some benevolent god out there. Then he closed his eyes and tried to go back to sleep.

Unfortunately, it didn’t work. Once he was awake, he was awake.

“It’s been five minutes!” Jisung shouted.

“I don’t remember hiring you as my personal alarm clock!” Jeongin growled.

“I get bored easily, it’s something to do,” Jisung said. “Besides, when you’re up, I have someone to talk to!”

“Go talk to Felix,” Jeongin scoffed. “Or Minho. Isn’t Minho still up?”

“He’s currently distracted by a new cat café that just went in down the street.”

Jeongin didn’t even know how to respond to _that._ He wanted to just lie in bed forever, but he was unfortunately wide awake now. He had nothing else to do but get up and get ready for work.

“There we go!” Jisung cheered as Jeongin threw back the covers and got up. “That’s the spirit, Innie!”

Jeongin walked over to the window, smiled, and promptly shut it. Jisung responded by blasting him in the face with sunshine, momentarily blinding him. But at least Jeongin couldn’t hear Jisung anymore.

He walked out of his room, still rubbing sleep out of his eyes and sight back into them. A glance at the grandfather clock in the living room told him that he had overslept and that he really was late for work. That was strange. Why hadn’t Woojin woken him up? Woojin always woke him up when he overslept. Usually with no sympathy whatsoever, no matter how much Jeongin whined and complained about being woken up so early.

Jeongin just shrugged it off and rounded the corner to the kitchen. There, he stopped in his tracks.

Woojin was sitting at the kitchen table, a mug of tea in front of him, his head in his hands.

Woojin was _never_ still here this late in the morning. He was always out and about taking care of the bookstore or doing whatever business he did in the city. Not to mention how his strong shoulders were slumped. He looked so…sad.

“Woojin?”

Woojin jumped at the sound of Jeongin’s voice and quickly looked up. Jeongin almost took a half-step back. If he had thought based on body language that Woojin looked bad, well, his face was even worse. His skin looked somewhat pale and sickly, unlike its usual golden tan, there were dark rings under his eyes, and his eyes were rimmed with red. Upon stepping closer, Jeongin also noticed some sort of cloudiness in Woojin’s eyes, like they weren’t quite seeing clearly.

“Oh, Jeongin,” Woojin said. His voice was even hoarse. He cleared it, which helped somewhat. “I didn’t hear you get up.”

Jeongin frowned at him. “Are you okay, Woojin? You look…awful.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m fine.” Woojin smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes and therefore didn’t reassure Jeongin in the slightest. “I’m fine, I’m fine. Just didn’t sleep very well, that’s all.”

Jeongin knew what “not sleeping well” looked like on Woojin, and it definitely wasn’t this. “You look sick. Are you sick?” He stepped forward and pressed his hand to Woojin’s forehead, like he had seen some humans do. He wasn’t entirely sure _why_ humans did it, but it seemed like the proper response to someone being sick.

Woojin jerked backwards, but not before Jeongin felt the heat pulsing through Woojin’s forehead. When Jeongin blinked down at Woojin in surprise, Woojin just smiled at him and took Jeongin’s hand in his.

“Ah, it’s okay, Innie,” Woojin said. “I’m not sick. I promise.”

Jeongin didn’t believe him for a second. But he didn’t know what else to do, since Woojin was so stubborn. So he just nodded and said, “Okay, but—”

“Are you hungry?” Woojin pulled away and stood up, his attention now on the refrigerator. “I could make eggs or sausage or something. Probably not pancakes, since they take awhile. Do eggs and sausage sound good, though?”

Jeongin blinked at him, but managed to nod. He forced a smile. “Sure. That sounds good.”

Woojin smiled back at him before getting out the eggs and sausage. He completely threw himself into cooking Jeongin breakfast and never even realized that he didn’t say a single word to Jeongin for the rest of the morning.

*

Work was…boring. It was always so boring. Today, even more so. Thank goodness for Felix and his never-ending source of energy, because otherwise Jeongin would have lost his mind. Or, rather, he would have gotten lost _in_ his mind.

It still happened, somewhat. He found himself drifting, tuning Felix out, and inevitably thinking about Woojin. Woojin didn’t come to the shop at all that day, but that wasn’t unusual. Jeongin just couldn’t help wondering what was wrong with him. Sure, humans got sick, but what _happened_ when they got sick? Did they die? Was Woojin going to die if he didn’t get better?

Jeongin’s eyes widened to the point where it looked like he was having a crisis of some sort. It was noticeable enough for Felix to stop mid-sentence and give him a concerned look.

“Innie, are you okay?” Felix asked. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Can humans die from getting sick?”

Felix raised his eyebrows at that. “They can,” he admitted. “But it has to be a very, very bad sickness. Like the flu, or the Plague. But most of them bounce back no problem.” He smiled, but when Jeongin didn’t smile back, his smile faded. The look of concern returned. “Are you feeling sick, Innie?” He pressed his hand to Jeongin’s forehead.

Jeongin couldn’t help snorting.

“Hmm,” Felix said, pulling back. “You don’t feel warm.”

“Is that why humans do that?” Jeongin asked. He pressed his own hand to his head. “I thought it was a sign of sympathy or something.”

Felix cracked a smile. “No, no, it’s to see if the human feels warm. If they feel warmer than usual, that means they have a fever. And fevers are bad for humans.”

“Like, bad as in _deadly_?” Jeongin’s eyes widened.

“Sometimes,” Felix said. “Only if the fever doesn’t go away after a few days. That’s when you should be worried.”

“Okay.” Jeongin nodded to himself. “Okay. That’s very helpful, Felix, thank you.”

Felix just smiled and continued on with whatever he had been talking about.

Later that night, Woojin was in the middle of talking about a new book that he was interested in selling at the store when Jeongin pressed his hand up to his forehead. He was surprised and pleased to find that Woojin’s forehead was not burning up like it had been earlier that day. Maybe he was right, and maybe he just hadn’t slept well. He didn’t have the flu or the Plague after all.

Woojin cut-off mid-sentence like Felix had done, looking down at Jeongin in surprise. “Jeongin, what are you doing?” he asked, arching an eyebrow.

“Just checking.” Jeongin couldn’t help grinning and removing his hand. “It broke!”

Woojin blinked at him, confused, but then smiled. “Alright, then.” He picked up where he left off, and Jeongin just smiled at him, only half-listening. He was just happy that Woojin wasn’t sick after all.

Besides, Jeongin wouldn’t know what to do if Woojin died from sickness. He wouldn’t know what to do at all.

*

Woojin didn’t seem to be acting strangely after that day. Jeongin decided that it really _had_ just been a result of a poor night’s sleep and went about with his day. He still kept an eye out for any signs that Woojin wasn’t feeling well, though.

Usually he wouldn’t be so obsessed over something that had been resolved, but he couldn’t help it. He cared about Woojin a lot. Woojin was like family to him, despite them only knowing each other for a few months. If something happened to him, Jeongin would be devastated.

But perhaps another reason why Jeongin was so hyper-focused on Woojin’s health was because it gave him something _else_ to worry about other than his main worry. And his main worry liked to come around the bookstore much more often now and was called “Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin, who was currently holding his finger incredibly close to Jeongin’s face without Jeongin realizing until he turned his head and caused the finger to jab into his cheek.

Jeongin blinked in surprise, while Hyunjin grinned so widely that it made Jeongin smile despite himself.

“Cute,” Hyunjin said. Then he sighed dramatically and draped himself over the table in the backroom of the bookstore, upon which were boxes of new books Jeongin had to unpack and put out in a display. “I’m _bored_ , Innie.”

“I’m sorry,” Jeongin said. “Although, I _did_ tell you when you came in that I wasn’t doing anything interesting and that you’d probably be bored, so…”

Hyunjin cracked a smile. “Yeah, but I said that I wouldn’t mind because all I want to do is spend time with you.”

Sometimes Jeongin wished he wouldn’t say things like that. Sometimes he wished Hyunjin wasn’t even here. Sometimes he wished Hyunjin hadn’t taken the truth so well, and that they had ended up estranged again. All of that would have been easier than dealing with… _this_. Being friends, being _close_ , but never being close _enough_.

But at the same time, he was too deeply in love with Hyunjin at this point to even _consider_ cutting him out of his life. If the universe wanted them to just be friends, well…Jeongin could handle it.

(Or so he thought—it still fucking sucked)

“How was work?” Jeongin decided to ask, in the process of taking the price tag stickers off a sheet of paper and sticking them to the back of the new books.

“Honestly? Pretty great.” Hyunjin grinned. “You should have seen the look on my agent’s face when I told him I was quitting. He went into this huge rant about how I’ll never be a top model and I’ll never be recognized or sponsored, and then when _that_ didn’t have the effect he wanted, he started talking about all the things he’ll do to make things better for me. I just smiled at him, told him to have a good day, and walked out.”

“That’s awesome,” Jeongin said, and he meant it. He was happy Hyunjin was finally happy, or on his way to a happier life.

“Yeah, I’m so glad to be free of that place,” Hyunjin said. “Now I can just enjoy summer and not stress over everything.”

Jeongin smiled but then looked back down at the books.

Hyunjin was silent for a few moments, during which Jeongin could _feel_ his eyes on him. He was doing that _stare_ again, the kind where he tried to stare into Jeongin’s mind or soul and see what was going on in there. Jeongin hated it as always, though he discovered he could tolerate it as long as he wasn’t making eye-contact with Hyunjin while Hyunjin was doing it.

Finally, though, Hyunjin said, “Honestly, I couldn’t have done that without you or Seungmin. Seungmin’s been telling me to quit since day one, so I have to give him some credit, but after I met you, I kind of decided I wanted to be happier. You gave me enough courage to quit in the first place.”

And there he was, saying those _things_ again. Jeongin almost grimaced, but he had to admit that those words did touch his heart.

“I…I did?” He looked up at Hyunjin and frowned.

Hyunjin nodded, smiling. “Yeah. I mean, _after_ I found out that you’re some celestial being who can shape-shift into a fox and a human.”

Jeongin snorted and went back to slapping on price tags.

“But seriously, I feel so much… _happier_ now that I know the truth,” Hyunjin said. “Now that we’re friends who get to hang out. I never realized how lonely I was until I had you, you know? Well, I also had Seungmin, but he’s been busy with summer classes and work and _Felix,_ so…” He trailed off.

Jeongin had no idea how to respond to that, since he somewhat felt like dying right there, but luckily Hyunjin talked enough for the two of them that he didn’t notice Jeongin’s silence.

“So, I was thinking.” Hyunjin sat up, bouncing a little with excitement and causing the entire table to shake slightly. “Since it’s summer, and since we’re both finally _free_ , how about we _do_ something?”

“Do something other than sort books in a dusty bookstore all day?”

“Yeah, do something _fun_. There are so many things I can show you! Like amusement parks and movies and arcades and—I don’t know—just all the fun things that we have to offer here on Earth. Don’t even get me _started_ on all the good food you’re missing out on.”

Jeongin just blinked at him. “I don’t know half of the words that just came out of your mouth. What the heck is an amusement park? Or an arcade?”

Hyunjin grinned so widely that his eyes turned into crescents. “God, why are you so _cute_?” He leaned forward to poke Jeongin’s face again. “That decides it—we are _definitely_ going to go to an amusement park. And an arcade. And eat all of the street food we can stomach.”

“Street food? We’re eating off the street?” Jeongin couldn’t help looking appalled.

“Not the _actual_ street,” Hyunjin said with a giggle. “People have little carts and trucks and stuff and they cook food for you right there. It’s the best food you’ll ever have, trust me.”

“Okay,” Jeongin said. “I trust you.”

“Awesome! Let’s go Friday, then.”

Jeongin was about to agree, but then he remembered his worries about Woojin and his health, which then made him think about all of Woojin’s rules, which were still in effect despite Hyunjin knowing the truth now. His smile promptly vanished from his face as he stared down at the book. “I can’t,” he said.

“What?” Hyunjin blinked in surprise. “But I thought you don’t work Fridays.”

“I’m worried about Woojin,” Jeongin said.

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“He’s just…he doesn’t look well. I’m worried he might be dying or something.” Jeongin’s eyes went wide. “I wouldn’t know what to do if he died. Or even how to take care of him if he’s sick. What if he dies because I can take care of him while he’s sick?”

“Whoa, whoa, Innie, calm down.” Hyunjin moved forward and put his hands on Jeongin’s shoulders. “Everything is going to be okay. Let’s not jump to conclusions, alright? Humans get sick all the time, but that doesn’t mean they die from it. He might just have a common cold."

“But he looked _awful_ ,” Jeongin said. “His face was all pale and clammy and his eyes were red and he looked exhausted. He said he just hadn’t slept well but then I felt his forehead and it was warm. Warm means fever, like Felix said.”

“Innie, he probably didn’t sleep because he was coming down with something,” Hyunjin said calmly. “But that’s okay—there’s medicine for sicknesses, and there’s ways you can take care of sick people. Don’t worry, everything is going to be okay.”

Jeongin just nodded, hating how the tears welled up in his eyes. He was so sick of crying. He was determined to cry less from now on.

“I still can’t go out into the city,” he said, staring down at the books.

Hyunjin frowned. “Why not?”

“Woojin has rules. I’m not allowed to go to the city in human form by myself. Or, without him or Felix.”

Hyunjin’s frown turned somewhat into a pout before it turned somewhat thoughtful. “What if we asked Felix to come with? He and Seungmin could come along.” He grinned and threw his hands into the air. “Double date!”

Jeongin couldn’t stop the way his face lit up at that, but of course Hyunjin had to ruin it by saying, “Wait, no, you and I aren’t dating, it can’t be a double date.”

“Oh,” Jeongin said, his good mood plummeting. He gave a forced laugh anyways to lighten the suffocating tension, though he was pretty sure he was the only one experiencing that tension.

“It’ll still be fun to go in a bigger group,” Hyunjin said. “Plus, you’ll get to meet Seungmin! I still can’t believe the two of you haven’t really _met_ before. Not even in fox form. Did you know that when I told him about my theory about you that he told me I was crazy?”

“I would hope most people would think you’re crazy when you tell them something like that,” Jeongin said. “It _is_ crazy.”

Hyunjin snorted at that and shoved Jeongin’s shoulder playfully. “Stop calling me crazy, man. I was right, wasn’t I?”

“You were. But did you tell Seungmin that you were right?”

“Nope,” Hyunjin said, popping the _p_ in that word. He smiled. “And I don’t think I will, because I want him to figure it out by himself just like I did. It might take you shifting right in front of him but, eh, minor things.” He waved the thought away.

Jeongin snorted at that, once again looking down at the books. He was so close to being finished.

“So,” Hyunjin said, “Friday?”

Jeongin sighed but smiled. “Friday.”

Hyunjin’s face broke into a grin again.

*

“How am I supposed to run an entire store without the two of you?” Woojin asked Thursday night, frowning. “Not to mention how Felix is _scheduled_ to work tomorrow. He doesn’t just get the day off to do whatever he wants.”

“You’ve run the store by yourself before the two of us came along,” Felix said from where he was currently munching on a bag of chips. Since he tended to spill crumbs everywhere whenever he ate, he was forced to eat only in the kitchen of the small apartment. Which was why he was standing in the doorway of the kitchen in an attempt to still be apart of the conversation happening in the living room.

“Please, Woojin?” Jeongin pleaded. “I really want to hang out with Hyunjin and the only way we can do that is if Felix comes along.”

“I could do a half-day,” Felix told Woojin.

“No, you’re doing the full day,” Woojin said. “You get off at five, anyways, so you could always go do whatever it is you want to do after work.”

“The amusement park closes shortly after five,” Felix said. “We wouldn’t be able to fully enjoy it in such a short time.”

Woojin just shrugged, like, _not my problem_.

Jeongin pouted. Half of him was wondering why Woojin was being so grumpy, while the other half was concerned. Woojin had had three cups of tea within the past few hours alone. Usually he only had one cup a night. Not to mention how he claimed he didn’t have an appetite. Was this all part of him being sick?

“Well,” Felix said, looking at Jeongin. “You could always just come over to Seungmin’s. We could do a game night there for as late as we want. It’ll be like our own, special arcade. And we can order lots of takeout so we still have good food.” He smiled.

“Maybe,” Jeongin said, unable to keep himself from pouting.

“It’ll be fun,” Felix said. “Besides, it’ll help us work up to the amusement park. I think amusement parks would be a bit too overwhelming for you, and we don’t want you freaking out in public.”

He said it lightly, and Jeongin still smiled, though he knew what Felix was really saying. _We don’t want you to shift into a fox in public and freak everyone_ else _out_ , basically. And Jeongin agreed. It was part of the reason why he hadn’t really explored what being a human had to offer.

“Game night sounds fun,” Jeongin said.

“Aw, man, I’m totally going to teach you how to play Mario Kart.” Felix grinned.

Jeongin just smiled, since he had no idea what that was and if he should be scared or not. He looked at Woojin, who was staring down at his tea. “Is that okay, Woojin?”

“As long as it’s after work and as long as you don’t come home too late,” Woojin said.

Felix snorted.

“Okay, deal.” Jeongin beamed.

Woojin smiled back before sighing and waving the two of them off. “Okay, that’s sorted, so go away and let me read in peace.”

“Old man,” Felix said.

Jeongin grinned right as there was a knock at the door. Since he was the closest to the door, he got up to answer it.

He was surprised to find Hyunjin standing there.

“Oh, Hyunjin,” Jeongin said, blinking. “Hi.”

“Hi, Innie.” Hyunjin smiled warmly at him. “It’s really nice out tonight. I was wondering if you wanted to go for a walk?”

“ _Oooooooooooh,_ ” Felix called from inside.

Jeongin’s face immediately went red while Hyunjin managed a small, embarrassed smile.

“Uh, yeah, yeah, one second, let me just grab a jacket in case it’s cold,” Jeongin said.

“It’s not that cold,” Hyunjin said.

“Okay,” Jeongin said. Over his shoulder, he said, “I’ll be back in a little bit, Woojin.”

“Take your time, no hurry,” Felix said with a shit-eating grin.

“But don’t be too long, okay?” Woojin said.

“Okay, okay.” Jeongin quickly stepped out of the apartment and shut the door behind him. Then he turned and smiled at Hyunjin, who smiled back before they headed down the stairs together.

“So, I have a question for you,” Hyunjin said once they made out outside. It really was pleasant out—the sky was clearer than usual, the path by the river was perfectly empty except for them, and the air was the perfect temperature. There was a bit of a breeze coming off the water, but it didn’t bother Jeongin in the slightest. The only problem was that the moon was full tonight, which made it a bit difficult to ignore the fact that it wasn’t just _Jeongin and Hyunjin._ It was Jeongin, Hyunjin, and Minho.

Jeongin sighed and wished he could be alone with Hyunjin.

Regardless, he said to Hyunjin, “A question for me?”

“Yeah,” Hyunjin said. “What’s with Felix?”

Jeongin frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, does he know the truth about you and Woojin too?”

“Oh.” Jeongin couldn’t help smirking. “Yeah, of course he does. He’s like us.”

Hyunjin blinked in surprise. “Really? What constellation is he?”

“Well, he’s not a constellation, actually.” Jeongin couldn’t help noticing how close the two of them were walking. The back of his hands could brush Hyunjin’s if Hyunjin didn’t have his hands shoved in the pockets of his jacket. Jeongin sighed but forced himself to focus. “He’s a shooting star.”

Hyunjin arched an eyebrow, which led Jeongin to quickly explain.

“Though, he doesn’t really _shoot_ anymore, so I guess he’s just a star,” he said. “He’s been on Earth for awhile. He told me he wanted to know what it was like to be human, so he did everything humans are supposed to do. Like, go to school—which is how he met Seungmin—and then learn to drive and to get a job and to get an apartment and stuff like that. Now he’s done all of that and is just—what did he call it?— _vibing_. He’s just _vibing_.”

Hyunjin snorted. “Wow. He’s quite the character.”

“He’s very powerful, actually,” Jeongin added. “He can shift into anything he wants and he can grant whatever wish he wants. He’s…he’s almost like a god, in terms of his power. Actually, it’s because of him that I’m here.”

“Really?”

“He’s the one who heard my wish when I said I wanted to be on Earth.” Jeongin couldn’t help snorting. “He’s the one who turned me into a fox. We actually had a bit of an argument when he told me that, because I never wanted to be a _fox—_ I wanted to be human. He said I should have been more specific in my wish.” He made a face and tried to lower his voice a bit in an imitation of Felix saying, “‘How was I supposed to know that you wanted to be _human_? You’re the _little fox_! I thought it would be perfect!’”

Hyunjin laughed, probably at Jeongin’s poor impersonation, and Jeongin grinned.

“He has good intentions, but sometimes he gets a little confused,” Jeongin said. “So, word of advice—don’t say ‘ _I wish’_ around Felix, because he’ll get excited and grant whatever you said.”

“Good to know,” Hyunjin said with a little laugh. “But if I said, ‘man, I wish I had a million bucks,’ would he grant that?”

“Mm, probably not.” Jeongin grinned.

“Aw, come on!”

“He’s very picky about which wishes he grants. He’ll grant what he thinks you _need_ , not exactly what you _want_.”

“But what if I really, really _need_ a million bucks.” Hyunjin was grinning too. “I mean, look at my student debt and my shitty apartment—I think I need some money!”

Jeongin snorted. “He’d say that you’re already getting by just fine. You have a roof over your head and running water—what else could you need?”

“Picky.” Hyunjin snorted and shook his head, but he was still smiling. “So did he grant yours because he thought you needed to be a little fox on Earth?”

Jeongin’s smile faded as he looked away, out at the river. “I think he thought I needed a change of scenery. Or…or that I needed _someone_ or else I’d…fade.”

Hyunjin’s face had grown more serious now. “What do you mean, you’d fade?”

“Constellations can live for a very long time, but we’re not immortal,” Jeongin said. “We can still fade away into nothing. Disappear forever.”

“But why?” Hyunjin frowned. “Why would you fade?”

“Loneliness,” Jeongin said quietly. He stared down at the concrete path as they walked.

Hyunjin was silent for several moments. When he spoke again, his voice was soft. “You mean…you didn’t know Woojin when you were up there? Or Felix?”

Jeongin shook his head. “I didn’t have anyone.”

Again, Hyunjin was silent. Jeongin didn’t look at him, so he didn’t see Hyunjin moving towards him until he felt a hand wrap around his. He jumped and looked up, surprised, but Hyunjin just smiled and laced their fingers together.

“Well, now you’ve got me,” Hyunjin said. “And I’ve got you. And together we have Seungmin and Felix and Woojin. Well, actually, Woojin still doesn’t like me very much, but that’s okay.”

“Don’t forget Jisung and Minho,” Jeongin said.

“Who?”

“Oh, uh, the sun and moon. Jisung’s the sun, Minho’s the moon.”

Hyunjin blinked at him for a few moments before saying, “Oh.” He glanced up at the moon (who was strangely silent for once), then looked back at Jeongin, who smiled. Hyunjin smiled back and squeezed his hand. “Then yes, we have Jisung and Minho too.”

Jeongin hated how much he liked the sound of that. _We_. Him and Hyunjin. Together. Even if they were just friends.

It still stung, but not as much. Jeongin was still able to smile genuinely and swing their interlaced hands as they walked.

They held hands for the rest of the night.

*

The following night, Jeongin found himself sitting in Seungmin’s apartment, in front of a TV, holding some sort of plastic rectangle with buttons on it in his hands. A plastic rectangle that, apparently, was special and connected to the TV.

“So, how do you do this?” he asked, looking up at Hyunjin for help.

“So you press this button to go. Once you let go of it, you slow down and eventually stop,” Hyunjin said, reaching over to point at the numerous buttons on the plastic rectangle—called a _remote._ Or sometimes a _controller._ “And then you tilt left and right to turn. You’re controlling your character on the screen, see? You’re that guy with the red and white head—Toad. I chose him for you. Because he’s cute and so are you.” He grinned.

Jeongin just blinked, trying to process all of this information at once.

“You’ve seriously never played Mario Kart before?” Seungmin asked, coming back into the living room with a bowl of popcorn. Felix immediately sat forward and grabbed a handful. He dropped some on the floor as he tried to shove it into his mouth, but Seungmin apparently thought it was cute.

“Um.” Jeongin looked down at the remote. “No, I haven’t.”

“His parents didn’t have any kind of gaming console when he was growing up,” Hyunjin said. When Jeongin looked at him in confusion, Hyunjin looked back and seemed to say silently, _just go with it._ To Seungmin, Hyunjin added, “They were way more focused on studying and doing homework and stuff. Not all about having fun.”

“My parents were like that too,” Seungmin told Jeongin. “I mean, we still had video games and stuff because they weren’t _that_ strict, but we weren’t allowed to play them until we were finished with our homework and after we studied for an additional hour.”

“You rarely studied in that additional hour,” Hyunjin scoffed. “You always snuck in your Nintendo DS and played on it and then hid it and pretended to be studying when your mom came in.”

Seungmin waved the thought away. “Minor things.”

There was a beat of silence during which Seungmin looked at Jeongin curiously. Jeongin realized then that it was his turn to contribute something to the conversation.

“Um, thank goodness that’s all in the past now so we can play with this whenever we want,” he decided to say.

Hyunjin snorted at that, but Seungmin smiled.

“I’d drink to that if I had a drink,” Felix said. His face lit up with an idea. “Oh my god, what would happen if Innie tried alcohol?”

“No!” Hyunjin exclaimed. “We are not getting Innie drunk!”

“He’d be a lightweight,” Felix decided. “He’d be gone after a shot.”

“You’re gone after a shot,” Seungmin retorted.

Felix just grinned like he knew something they didn’t.

“Alright, let’s just do a practice round,” Hyunjin said, picking up his controller. “Go easy on Innie, okay? Don’t hit him with blue shells.”

“What blue shells?” Jeongin asked as they pressed play on the game.

“Oh, you’ll find out,” Seungmin said with a devilish smirk.

It turned out that there were _many_ things Jeongin had to watch out for. Like banana peels. And falling off the edge of the map. And trying to jump and failing. And dodging parts of the map that _moved_. And, yes, blue shells.

It really was overwhelming, and Jeongin really did _suck_ at this game, but he still found himself smiling regardless. Especially at how competitive Hyunjin and Felix got. They regularly hit each other with blue shells, causing the one to scream in rage while the other laughed his head off. Jeongin nearly fell off the couch the first time he heard Hyunjin yell at Felix for hitting him. Seungmin just laughed at all of them and regularly won first place.

After a few rounds, though, Jeongin got the hang of it.

“Who just hit me!?” Hyunjin exclaimed. “Goddammit, Felix!”

“That wasn’t me!” Felix protested.

“Bullshit!”

“It wasn’t!”

“Yay, second place!” Jeongin said.

Hyunjin and Felix stared at him, and Jeongin just flashed them an innocent smile.

“Son of a—” Hyunjin started to say as Felix dissolved into a fit of laughter. Hyunjin grinned anyways and elbowed Jeongin, saying, “You’re getting the hang of this!”

“Yep, now I’m going to kick your ass!” Jeongin said. He had learned a whole bunch of curse words just from the past few hours alone. Hyunjin and Felix were very… _colorful_ with their language when they got competitive.

Hyunjin stared at him again for a few moments before a grin appeared on his face. “Oh it is _on_ , Foxface.”

“Bring it, Crybaby,” Jeongin retorted.

Both Felix and Seungmin looked surprised at that, but Hyunjin just grinned at Jeongin and started a new game.

Jeongin did kick his ass. Just saying.

“Okay, new game,” Hyunjin said once he lost for the fifth time in a row to Jeongin. He was such a sore loser that he knocked Jeongin’s controller out of his hand. As a joke, of course. “Time for Smash Bros.”

“For what?” Jeongin asked.

“Oh, I am _so_ going to kick all of your asses at this,” Felix said.

“Oh, sure,” Seungmin scoffed. “Like your Zelda can beat _my_ Kirby.”

Jeongin had no idea what was going on and was even more overwhelmed by this game and all its character choices than the last one. Hyunjin helped him again, momentarily taking Jeongin’s controller from him to choose a character for him. He selected some yellow thing named Pikachu.

“He has some powerful hits,” Hyunjin told Jeongin when Jeongin just blinked at the screen blankly. He grinned. “Plus he’s cute.”

“If you keep calling Jeongin cute, we’re gonna think you have a crush on him,” Seungmin said without looking away from the screen. He was in the process of choosing a map for them.

Jeongin snorted at that even if it was painful, but then he saw the blush on Hyunjin’s face. Wait a second—

“It’s in a brotherly sort of way,” Hyunjin retorted, though he was avoiding Jeongin’s gaze. “Like, he’s cute as a younger brother.”

“Uh huh,” Seungmin said.

They played a few rounds of this new game, but Jeongin couldn’t figure it out for the life of him. He kept getting hit by other things in the map, which tended to constantly change and bring in new threats, or he fell off the edge of the map, or one of the other characters killed him. He got in a few good hits here and there, but most of the time he just tried to run away from everything. And usually failed.

Unlike the last game, this one was evenly matched. Seungmin didn’t win every single time. Sometimes Hyunjin won. Sometimes Felix won, usually due to his well-timed hits that knocked people off the map. Jeongin found it fun to just sit and watch them play instead, especially since he got to sit next to Hyunjin. Hyunjin got a little _too_ into the game and reacted accordingly, so Jeongin couldn’t lean against him or rest his head on his shoulder out of fear of getting shouldered in the face. But Jeongin was still just content with being near to him.

Eventually, though, he started dozing off.

“Aww, is the baby sleepy?” Felix teased, grinning. “Bedtime?”

“It’s only, like, eleven-thirty,” Seungmin retorted.

“It _is_ getting kinda late, though,” Hyunjin said, nudging Jeongin awake. “We’d better start heading back.”

“Aw, okay.” Felix smiled. “Be safe! Call us if you need anything!”

“Will do,” Hyunjin said.

After a bit of nudging and hugs and goodbyes, Hyunjin and Jeongin finally started to walk home. Jeongin couldn’t stop yawning despite himself. He was suddenly so drowsy that he couldn’t even really walk straight, and Hyunjin laughed as Jeongin repeatedly walked into him.

“You’re really tired, huh?” he said, bumping Jeongin’s shoulder with his. “Is this really so late for you?”

“Woojin goes to bed at ten and so do I,” Jeongin replied, yawning.

Hyunjin yawned too, then snorted. “Ah, stop yawning, you’re making me tired.”

Jeongin smirked at that.

“Did you have fun?” Hyunjin asked.

Jeongin nodded, still smiling at him. “Thank you.”

“Anytime,” Hyunjin said. “I had fun too.”

They smiled at each other, and for a moment Jeongin forgot that they were just friends. In this moment, it felt like they were more. He wanted it to last forever.

But then a panicked voice broke through. “Jeongin!” Minho said from up above.

“What?” Jeongin jerked backward from Hyunjin and looked up at the moon. Hyunjin frowned and looked up too.

“Something’s happened,” Minho said, sounding more worried and panicked than Jeongin had ever heard him. “Woojin—”

Jeongin didn’t even hear the rest of what he had to say. His eyes widened before he took off running. He was vaguely aware of Hyunjin giving a startled shout and running after him, but he didn’t acknowledge it. All he could focus on was getting home, getting to _Woojin_.

The run home passed in a blur. Suddenly Jeongin was running up the stairs, almost tripping in his haste to get to the front door. He fumbled with the key in the lock before he finally got it unlocked and threw open the door. At first glance, the apartment looked fine. Nothing was out of place. The only lights on were the floor lamp by Woojin’s favorite chair and the light over the kitchen sink; Woojin always left both on when he knew Jeongin was coming home late. Now, it was just enough light to illuminate the fact that Woojin was lying on the kitchen floor, unmoving.

“Woojin!” Jeongin darted over to him and dropped to his knees. Woojin was lying on his side, so Jeongin gently rolled him over onto his back. His eyes were closed; his skin was pale and sickly. Jeongin noticed this briefly before his eyes darted to the gash on the side of Woojin’s head. It was still oozing blood and had left a puddle of it on the floor. Just the sight of it caused Jeongin’s throat to constrict, his vision to tunnel, and suddenly it was incredibly difficult to breathe or focus.

He was vaguely aware of Hyunjin near him. Hyunjin reached forward and held his hand in front of Woojin’s nose before pressing into the side of his neck. He breathed a sigh of relief.

“He’s still breathing,” Hyunjin told Jeongin. “It’s okay, Jeongin, it’s going to be okay.”

“He’s bleeding—” Jeongin’s voice came out strangled. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t breathe. “He’s bleeding, Hyunjin, he’s going to die—”

Jeongin barely processed what happened after that. He wasn’t seeing clearly, wasn’t thinking clearly. Everything sounded like he was hearing it from underwater. He went from kneeling on the kitchen floor beside Woojin, to stepping out of the way when more people barged into the apartment carrying equipment that they used to tend to Woojin, to riding in some car again, to sitting in a cold, white hallway while people ran around.

The only thing he was constantly aware of throughout it all was Hyunjin. Hyunjin never left his side for a moment—not when those people showed up at the apartment, not during the car ride over, not even when they were sitting in the blank, white place that smelled of antiseptic that reminded Jeongin all too much of the vet. He stayed by his side the entire time, telling Jeongin everything that was happening, even if Jeongin didn’t quite process it. He even rubbed Jeongin’s back and put an arm around his shoulders and held his hand.

At one point, Jeongin snapped out of his daze long enough to hear Hyunjin update him on Woojin’s condition.

“They’re going to keep him here overnight,” Hyunjin said, holding Jeongin’s hand and rubbing soothing circles into the back of it with his thumbs. “Tomorrow, they’re going to run some tests to figure out what happened to him and if there’s any damage to his brain. There is a pull-out bed from a couch in his room for you to sleep on if you want to stay here.”

Jeongin immediately shook his head. “No. No. I want to go home.” This place was too much like the vet. He couldn’t stand it. If he stayed here, he would have a breakdown and shift for sure. He needed to go home.

“Okay.” Hyunjin smiled at him. “Okay, I’ll take you home.”

Jeongin just nodded.

Once there, he regained his senses, somewhat. He was so tired. All he could do was stand in the doorway and stare at the apartment, which was somewhat jostled from those other people coming in to help Woojin. It seemed so soulless. Empty.

“Let’s get you ready for bed, okay?” Hyunjin said.

Jeongin nodded again. Hyunjin took over from there, helping change Jeongin out of his clothes and into his pajamas. Then he made sure Jeongin washed his face and brushed his teeth and even set a glass of water on the nightstand in his room.

Once Jeongin sat down on the edge of his bed, though, he stopped Hyunjin from starting to tuck him in by taking hold of his wrist. Hyunjin raised his eyebrows at him.

Jeongin couldn’t even meet his gaze as he asked, “Can you stay?”

“Of course,” Hyunjin said without missing a beat. “Of course, Jeongin. I’m not going to leave you like this. I’ll just sleep out on the couch.”

Jeongin shook his head.

“No?” Hyunjin said.

“Can you sleep…can you sleep here?” Jeongin stared down at the bed. “With me?”

This time Hyunjin hesitated, and Jeongin quickly added, “I can shift so it doesn’t seem so weird—”

“No, no, you don’t need to do that.” Hyunjin smiled. “Yes, I can sleep here with you.”

Jeongin exhaled in relief. “You can borrow some of my clothes if you want,” he said.

“Okay.” Hyunjin nodded again. “I’m gonna go get ready for bed, then, okay?”

“Okay.”

Hyunjin was only gone for a short time, but it felt like forever. Jeongin struggled to keep his eyes open from where he was already in bed, finally feeling the exhaustion of the day. The clock on the bedside table read three a.m. already; he was pretty sure he had never stayed up this late during his entire time on Earth.

Finally Hyunjin came back, and he climbed in on the other side of the bed. Jeongin waited until he got situated before whispering, “Thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me,” Hyunjin said.

Jeongin didn’t reply to that.

“Goodnight, Innie,” Hyunjin said. “Get some sleep, okay?”

“Mm-kay,” Jeongin said. “Goodnight, Hyunjin.”

He fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.

*

Jeongin woke up enveloped in warmth. It was almost _too_ much warmth to the point where he was uncomfortable, but he didn’t move. He saw that he was curled up against Hyunjin’s chest and immediately threw the idea of moving out the window. There was no way he was passing up on the opportunity to cuddle Hyunjin like this, even if he was already sweating.

As he woke up a little bit more, he noticed that Hyunjin had his arm wrapped around him, too, like he had reached over in the night and pulled Jeongin close. Their legs were even tangled up together. The two of them hadn’t been this close for a couple weeks. Not since Jeongin had told Hyunjin the truth. And they had never, ever been this close while Jeongin was in his human form.

He realized how much he missed this. Waking up next to Hyunjin. Hearing his heartbeat and little snores. Seeing his messy hair and puffy face. He missed it so much to the point where it was painful, and he almost pulled away because of it.

He did end up pulling away, just because he wanted to roll over and check the time. They needed to get to the hospital again and check on Woojin. What if Woojin woke up? Jeongin wanted to be there. Wanted to know what was wrong with him, so they could help him.

It was ten-thirty in the morning. If they got up now, they could get ready, get some food, and get to the hospital within an hour. The sooner the better, in Jeongin’s opinion.

He was about to get up, but then Hyunjin’s arm tightened from where it had fallen to Jeongin’s waist. Jeongin went rigid as Hyunjin pulled him backwards, to his chest, until he could press his face up to Jeongin’s neck. He went still after that, and based on the sound of his breathing, he was still asleep.

Jeongin, on the other hand, was completely awake and completely rigid. His heart was pounding so hard and his entire body was getting hotter and hotter by the minute. He was terrified that Hyunjin was able to feel all of this, even though the rational part of his brain told him that there was no way a pounding heart alone could wake Hyunjin.

With another glance at the clock, Jeongin decided that they could stay like this for five more minutes. After that, Jeongin was getting up.

He spent those five minutes all too focused on the fact that Hyunjin’s face was literally snuggled into the crook of his neck and that he could feel Hyunjin’s light breaths on his skin. It almost made him shy away because of how weird it felt, but at the same time it was so…endearing. Intimate.

 _Do really, really good friends do this?_ Jeongin wondered to himself. He tried to imagine Hyunjin treating Seungmin like this. Sure, the two of them were close and would probably cuddle, but Jeongin was pretty sure that neither of them would bury their face in the other’s neck for long periods of time like this. And they definitely wouldn’t reach for each other in the middle of the night and wake up tangled up in each other.

Right…?

Jeongin shook his head at himself. He was just going to cause himself more pain in the long run if he allowed himself to hope like this. He and Hyunjin were _friends_ , and that’s all they would ever be.

The five minutes were up. Jeongin took a deep breath and slowly pulled away from Hyunjin before trying to push himself up. He thought Hyunjin would drop his arm from him, but _no._ Hyunjin just latched on and tried to pull Jeongin back, making it incredibly difficult to get out of bed. Jeongin almost fell over and let out something equivalent to a squawk of surprise as he caught himself.

“Hyunjin,” he said, trying to unwrap Hyunjin’s arm from around his waist. It was harder than it looked. “Hey, wake up. We gotta get up and go.”

Hyunjin just whined and squeezed his eyes shut tighter.

Jeongin snorted at his expression but said, “Come on, wake up.”

“Just wanna lay in bed all day,” Hyunjin mumbled.

“We can do that another day, but now we gotta get up. Come on.”

Hyunjin sighed but finally released Jeongin. Jeongin got up immediately, already panicking about taking too long to get to the hospital.

“I’m going to go get ready,” he told Hyunjin. “You can sleep for a few more minutes, but after I’m done, I’m dragging you out of this bed.”

“Can your twig arms even do that?” Hyunjin opened an eye to look up at him.

Jeongin snorted. “Guess we’ll find out.”

“Mm.” Hyunjin promptly closed his eye again and went back to dozing.

With a roll of his eyes, Jeongin went into the bathroom. He took a quick shower, washed his face, and brushed his teeth. Then he went back into his room, where Hyunjin had not moved one bit.

Jeongin couldn’t help grinning as he took a running start and jumped onto the bed. Hyunjin let out a startled yelp.

“Up, up, up,” Jeongin said, bouncing on the bed with every word. “We have to go check on Woojin.”

“Okay, okay, I’m up!” Hyunjin groaned, pushed himself up, and rubbed at his eyes. “I did _not_ expect you to jump on the bed. You scared the shit out of me!”

Jeongin grinned before jumping off the bed. “It got you up, didn’t it?”

Hyunjin just smirked at him, and from where he was currently sitting on the bed, wearing Jeongin’s clothes with bedhead and a puffy face, Jeongin realized he had never looked more beautiful. It caused this strange stirring in the pits of his stomach. He quickly turned away before he got too flustered.

“I’ll make you breakfast while you get ready,” Jeongin said. “You can wear some of my clothes again if you want.”

Hyunjin sighed, making Jeongin look over his shoulder in surprise. “It’s just—this should be the other way around,” Hyunjin said. “I should be the one taking care of you.”

“You took care of me last night, it’s okay,” Jeongin said. “It’s how I’m coping.” Then he left the room without another word.

About forty minutes later, they showed up at the hospital. Hyunjin did most of the talking at the front desk, during which they discovered that Woojin had woken up this morning and had already done a couple of tests. He was in the process of another one and wouldn’t be back to his room for a little while. Hyunjin nodded and led Jeongin back to the waiting room.

They sat there in silence for a long time. Jeongin just stared at the floor, his mind completely blank. Hyunjin fidgeted a bit and snuck glances at Jeongin that he thought Jeongin wouldn’t notice. Jeongin did, but he didn’t have the strength right now to focus on them.

At one point, Felix came in.

He saw them immediately and rushed over. “How is he? Do we have any updates? What’s going on right now?”

Hyunjin gestured for him to calm down as Felix collapsed into the chair next to Jeongin. “He’s just doing some tests right now. He should be back in his room any minute and then we can go see him.”

Felix exhaled in relief. To Jeongin, he said, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t hear Minho or Jisung trying to get my attention until this morning. They said you found him?”

“Yeah,” Jeongin said, his voice hoarse. He cleared it before continuing. “He fell in the kitchen and hit his head.”

“Oh no.” Felix covered his mouth with his hand, his eyes wide.

“The paramedics came right away, though,” Hyunjin said, leaning forward and placing his hand over Jeongin’s. Felix’s eyes went to Hyunjin’s hand, but Hyunjin pretended not to notice. “They got him to the hospital and took care of him. He even woke up this morning. He’ll be okay.”

“Thank you,” Felix said. “Really. Thank you for taking care of Woojin and Innie for me. I’m sorry I wasn’t there.” He lowered his head.

“It’s okay, Lixie,” Jeongin said.

“Yeah, it’ll all be okay, don’t worry.” Hyunjin smiled.

They fell back into silence after that.

Finally, though, the nurse told them they could go see Woojin. Jeongin practically jumped up and sprinted after her, though Hyunjin held him back. They managed to walk to Woojin’s room at a normal pace like normal people. Jeongin’s heart pounded harder and harder with every step, bringing them closer and closer and closer until—

They opened the door to find Woojin already completely dressed and in the process of tying his shoes. He looked up when the door opened.

“Oh,” he said. “Hi.”

“Hi?” Felix said.

“What are you doing?” Jeongin asked, walking forward. “Shouldn’t you be in bed? Resting?”

“No, they finished all their tests so they said I could go home.” Woojin finished tying his shoes and stood. He smiled at Jeongin. “So, let’s go home, yeah? I’m already sick of this place.”

“Wait, they discharged you that quickly?” Hyunjin asked with a frown.

“Yep.” Woojin turned his smile on Hyunjin, though it now looked somewhat forced.

“But there’s no way that the test results could have come back already,” Hyunjin said. “Not to mention discharging is a long process that takes—”

“It doesn’t really matter,” Woojin interrupted. “The tests are over and I feel fine, so let’s go home.”

He pushed past Hyunjin and walked out of the room before any of them could say another word.

*

Jeongin, Hyunjin, and Felix stared at Woojin during the entire ride home. He either didn’t notice or didn’t care, because he didn’t acknowledge them at all. The moment their Uber dropped them off at the bookstore, Woojin strode through the door and went right upstairs to the apartment. The other three lingered outside for a few moments, all wearing identical frowns.

“Something’s not right,” Hyunjin said.

“Definitely not,” Felix said. He sighed. “But, typical Woojin. Always putting on a face to pretend like he’s fine when he’s really not. I’ve tried for years to get him to open up to me. No luck. He’s never going to tell us what happened.”

Jeongin suddenly scowled. Rage boiled up in him, making him clench his jaw and square his shoulders. “Yeah, well, I’m sick of it,” he said. “I want answers.”

“What?” Hyunjin and Felix looked at him in surprise when he marched forward.

Jeongin didn’t even spare them a glance as he ran up the stairs and threw open the door to the apartment. Woojin was in the kitchen, as always, in the middle of filling the kettle and putting it on the stove for tea. He glanced up at Jeongin when he came in but otherwise seemed unfazed by Jeongin’s dramatic entrance.

Jeongin stopped by the table and asked, “Are you sick?”

“Do I look sick?” Woojin countered, arching an eyebrow.

“Answer the question,” Jeongin said. “Please.”

Woojin looked at him for a few moments before turning back to his little box of tea packets. “No, I am not sick,” he said.

“Then what happened?” Jeongin asked. “Why did you fall?”

“I spilled some tea, slipped, and hit my head.” Woojin shrugged. “Nothing serious, really.”

He didn’t look at Jeongin at all.

“Stop lying to me,” Jeongin said, though his voice came out much gentler than before. Now he just sounded exhausted. “Please, Woojin, just tell me the truth for once.”

Woojin finally looked up. Surprise flashed in his eyes but vanished so quickly that Jeongin wondered if he had imagined it or not. “When have I ever lied to you?”

The answer was so frustrating that the anger boiled up in him again. He suddenly couldn’t stop himself from exclaiming, “Stop _doing that_!”

“Stop what?”

“Stop answering my questions with questions! Just give me a clear answer! For once in your life would you please just _talk to me_?”

When Woojin just stared at him in surprise, Jeongin grew more frustrated to the point where the words came pouring out of him.

“Do you have any idea how worried I was about you?” he demanded. “I came home to find you bleeding out on the floor! And then a few days before that you were pale and sickly and had a fever and yet you just waved it off like it was nothing. It’s not nothing, Woojin! If you’re sick or dying or if something is going on, then you need to _tell us_! You need to tell me and Felix. Because one day something bad is going to happen and Felix and I will be the ones to find you and I don’t _want_ that day to come. I don’t want to lose you, Woojin—I _can’t_ lose you.”

There were tears in his eyes now, while his throat felt raw, like he had swallowed fire or something. He rubbed at his eyes. He was not going to cry. He was not going to cry. Not this time.

Meanwhile, Woojin was just staring at him, now looking more shocked than anything.

“Please just tell me what’s going on,” Jeongin pleaded. “Please.”

Woojin shook his head. “I can’t.”

“Why not?” Jeongin practically spat out the word and made Woojin flinch. “Why not, Woojin? Because I’m too young? Because I’m too naïve? Because I’m too emotional to handle it? Because you don’t trust me?”

“No!” Woojin said, his voice starting to rise too. “No to all of that!”

“Then _WHY NOT_?”

“Because I’m trying to _fucking protect you!_ ” Woojin shouted.

Jeongin took a step backwards. He had never heard Woojin shout like that. He had never seen Woojin’s eyes flash like that. It was terrifying. It reminded Jeongin that Woojin was much more powerful than him, that Woojin probably had numerous abilities that Jeongin couldn’t even comprehend.

He couldn’t help shrinking away in fear.

The anger in Woojin’s eyes drained away as he took a deep breath and took a step back. He ran his hands through his hair, though it looked like he was practically tearing out the strands.

“I don’t want you to make the same mistakes I did,” Woojin said quietly, his voice cracked and hoarse. “I don’t want you to get hurt like I did.”

Jeongin stared at him, his jaw dropped. When he finally got his voice back, he asked, “How will I learn from your mistakes if I don’t even know what your mistakes _are_?”

Woojin just shook his head and covered his face with his hand. He took a deep, shaking breath, the kind that sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

Jeongin’s eyes burned with tears of their own. He had never seen Woojin cry. He never wanted to see Woojin cry.

“I’m sorry,” he said, stepping forward.

“I’m dying, Jeongin,” Woojin said.

Jeongin went rigid. “What?” His voice sounded so small and helpless.

Woojin dropped his hand from his face. Suddenly he looked just like he did a few days ago—pale face, dark rings under red-rimmed eyes. He looked old. And sickly. Like the world had sucked all the life out of him. Like he had given up the fight already.

“You were right,” Woojin murmured. “I am sick. I am dying. I’m not okay, Jeongin.”

All the words died in Jeongin’s mouth. All the thoughts disappeared. All he could do was stare at Woojin, his jaw dropped, his eyes wide with horror.

He waited for Woojin to crack a smile and shove him playfully and say it was all a joke. That he wasn’t really dying and that he wasn’t really that sick and that it would all be okay in the end. That it would all go back to normal.

But none of that happened.

“No,” is all that came out of Jeongin’s mouth.

“That’s why I didn’t stay around at the hospital to hear the results,” Woojin said. “I know what’s happening. I don’t need to waste my time hearing it from them.”

Jeongin started to shake his head and back away, his throat once again constricting.

Woojin took another deep, shaky breath before adding, “We’re not meant to be on Earth, Jeongin. We’re constellations—we’re meant to be up in the sky. Human bodies are not designed for us. After long enough, they can’t handle it anymore. They start to break down. I didn’t want to tell you this because I didn’t want to worry or scare you.”

Jeongin looked up with wide eyes. “What?”

“You can’t stay on Earth forever,” Woojin said sadly. “Neither can I. If we do, we’ll die with our human form. It’s inevitable.”

Jeongin jerked backwards like Woojin had punched him.

“I’m sorry,” Woojin said. “I didn’t want you to find out like this. I’ve known for awhile, though.”

“How long?” Jeongin choked out. “How long do you have?”

Woojin shook his head. “A couple weeks at the most.”

“And…for me?”

Woojin studied him, his eyes so, so sad, before sighing. “You’re less powerful than I am, so your body shouldn’t deteriorate as quickly. I’ve been here for a little over a decade. For you, you could probably stretch it to fifteen more years, at the most.”

That wasn’t so bad. But compared to the lifespan of a constellation, that was barely a blip. Jeongin’s heart fell at the thought that he would barely be here for just a short while. And what was after that? Death? Or eternal loneliness up in the Celestial Sphere again?

Jeongin honestly couldn’t decide which one he’d rather have.

“I’m sorry,” Woojin said.

“Sorry?” Jeongin couldn’t help laughing. “You’re dying and you’re going to leave me all alone and all you can say is _sorry_?”

“You’re not alone,” Woojin shot back. “You have Felix and Hyunjin and Jisung and Minho. You’ll be fine, Jeongin, you’re much more capable than you think.”

“I won’t be fine because you’ll be _gone_ ,” Jeongin said. “You’ll be gone forever and what am I supposed to do without you?”

Woojin’s expression was heartbreaking. He looked so sad, so defeated. He really wasn’t going to fight at all, was he?

Suddenly all Jeongin could imagine was a life without Woojin. An empty apartment. An empty bookstore. No tea, no comfort-food hot dogs, no favorite books, no rules. No laughter and quiet humming. No going to bed ridiculously early and getting up before Jisung. No one to teach Jeongin how to navigate this confusing world, and no one to hold him and comfort him when he was overwhelmed.

Jeongin thought a life without Woojin wasn’t worth much at all.

Woojin was starting to say something, but Jeongin couldn’t take any more of this anymore. He turned and shifted into his familiar fox form before running out the door he hadn’t even realized was cracked the entire time. Woojin called after him, but Jeongin ignored him, just like he ignored Hyunjin and Felix standing on the other side of the front door, listening to everything. He ran downstairs and kept running, running, running.

He ran away from things too often.

But if Woojin was gone, then who was he going to run to?

*

Hyunjin saw the flash of light through the cracked front door, which was the only warning he got before the door was opening and there was a tiny fox running out. Hyunjin’s first instinct was to turn and run after him, but he paused and looked at Felix, who had taken the news about as well as Jeongin.

“Do you want me to—” Hyunjin started to say when Felix waved him off.

“No, no, I’m okay,” Felix said, sniffing and wiping at the tears on his face. “I, uh, I’ll be fine. Jeongin…he probably isn’t. You should go after him. I’m going to talk to Woojin.”

For the first time in the short time Hyunjin had known Felix, Felix’s face had never looked so…dull. Usually he was glowing, practically radiant, but now, the light was gone from his face. He looked so heartbroken. Hyunjin had the urge to hug him, but Felix was already stepping forward and pushing open the front door. Hyunjin took that as his cue and ran downstairs.

He discovered once he reached the sidewalk that his hesitation had cost him. Jeongin was fast, especially in fox form—he was long gone by now. Hyunjin had absolutely no idea where he went. The only place he could think of was his apartment, but he doubted Jeongin would go there now. Where else could Jeongin possibly go?

Jeongin was a creature of habit, though. He only went places he was comfortable with, which were currently limited to Hyunjin’s apartment, the bookstore, and the path and park running alongside the river. Hyunjin headed for the river, keeping his eyes peeled for any tiny fox curled up into a tight, little ball.

He didn’t have to go far. Within about ten minutes, he found what he was looking for. A tiny fox curled up on a park bench where someone had left their jacket. Even from the path, Hyunjin could see the way Jeongin was shaking. It tugged at his heart as he walked forward.

“Hey,” Hyunjin said softly, making Jeongin jump. Jeongin looked up at him, his eyes wide and somehow managing to produce tears even in this body. Then he quickly curled into a ball again.

“I heard everything,” Hyunjin murmured as he sat down on the other end of the bench. He wanted to give Jeongin some space. “Felix and I did. I’m so sorry, Jeongin.”

Jeongin just whimpered.

Just the sight of him could have been enough to make Hyunjin cry. But combined with everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours, Hyunjin’s tears had no difficulty showing themselves within a split second.

“I’m here for you,” Hyunjin whispered as the tears slipped down his cheeks. “You know that, right? I’m here for you if you ever need to talk or if you need a hug. I’m here. Always.”

Jeongin didn’t respond immediately. Hyunjin just sniffed and wiped at his eyes as he looked out at the river. There was no moon tonight. The only light came from the streetlamps nearby and the distant glow of the city lights themselves. Even though there was still plenty of light to see by, it still felt dark and gloomy.

After a moment, though, Hyunjin saw movement out of the corner of his eye. He looked back at Jeongin, who had unfurled himself and was currently climbing into Hyunjin’s lap. Hyunjin couldn’t help smiling as Jeongin put his tiny little fox head in the crook of Hyunjin’s neck. He wrapped his arms around him and stroked the soft fur on his back, thinking fondly of often they used to do this back when Hyunjin only knew Jeongin as Baby. The memories made him tighten his grip slightly, like he was afraid of Jeongin slipping away forever.

“It’ll be okay, Innie,” he murmured. “It’ll be okay.”

He knew Jeongin didn’t believe him, though.

*

Jeongin didn’t remember going to bed that night. He didn’t even remember shifting back into human form. He only remembered crying himself to sleep in Hyunjin’s arms, but he wasn’t entirely sure if he dreamed that too or not. He woke up in his bed with no memory of how he got there, and when he rolled over, he was disappointed to find that the bed was empty except for him.

The window was still open, though.

A ray of sunlight drifted up to Jeongin’s face.

“Hey, bud,” Jisung said, voice uncharacteristically soft.

“Hey,” Jeongin said hoarsely.

“How are you doing? Hanging in there?”

Jeongin just shrugged.

“One of those days where you just wanna lie in bed?”

Jeongin nodded.

The ray brightened just a bit, an indicator that Jisung was smiling. “Yeah, I don’t blame you. But maybe, just maybe, you might want to go talk to Woojin again. Just to smooth things over.”

Jeongin didn’t respond to that. He knew Jisung was right. It was just so difficult to get up and go talk to him. Too painful.

Jisung was silent for a few moments before adding, “Just saying, if he only has a couple weeks left, then I wouldn’t want to waste a single moment. I think now is the time to think of the things you’ve always wanted to do with Woojin and actually do them. Just a thought, though. I’ll let you rest.” The ray drifted away.

Jeongin laid there for a few minutes more, mulling Jisung’s words over. As painful as it was, Jisung was right. Jeongin had to face Woojin and smooth things over. He couldn’t waste a single moment now that…now that…

He still couldn’t admit it.

He pushed himself up and stumbled into the hallway.

Woojin was sitting at the kitchen table, a cup of tea in front of him as usual. He didn’t look _awful_ , but he didn’t look good either. He just looked tired.

Jeongin took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen.

Woojin glanced up at him as he slid into the chair across from him.

“Hi,” Jeongin said, unable to meet Woojin’s gaze.

“Hi,” Woojin said, the faintest trace of amusement audible through his exhausted tone.

“I want to say I’m sorry,” Jeongin said. “About yesterday. I shouldn’t have reacted that way. It didn’t make it any easier on you or anyone at all. I’m really sorry.”

“I forgive you,” Woojin said. “I never blamed you in the first place.”

Jeongin nodded, the tension between them finally subsiding, somewhat. It left an awkward silence in its place, though.

“So,” Woojin said.

“Can I ask you something?” Jeongin looked up at him.

Woojin raised his eyebrows but said, “Of course.”

“Was your time on Earth worth it?”

Woojin smiled, but it wasn’t the smile Jeongin expected. It was a sad smile. “I’d say so. I learned a lot. Although,” he took a deep breath and looked out the window over the sink, “I still have regrets. I think I’ll regret not doing a lot of things when the time comes.”

Jeongin stared at him for a few moments before asking, “Who says you can’t still do those things?”

Woojin looked surprised at that, which spurred Jeongin on.

“What if we did all of that now?” Jeongin scooted forward. “Do one last thing. Make you feel like you’ve really actually lived as a human on Earth. What if we did that, Woojin?”

Woojin blinked at him, still caught off-guard. It took him a few moments to formulate a response. And all his response came out as was, “That’s not going to work.”

“Why not?”

“Because it…it just isn’t?”

“I’m starting to think that’s your default response to everything,” Jeongin said. “Take it from one terrified little fox to another—although I suppose you’re more of a terrified little bear, which doesn’t really work, but anyways—most of the time we say things can’t work just because we’re afraid of doing them. We’d rather stay in our comfort zone than step out of it. But for once, Woojin, what’s one thing you want to do more than anything? Something you never did because you were afraid?”

Woojin exhaled slowly. “I don’t have one thing I’ve always wanted to do.”

Jeongin’s shoulders drooped. “You don’t?”

“I have a list.”

“Wait, what?” Jeongin blinked in surprise, his face lighting up. “Really?”

Woojin nodded, glancing away shyly. “I wrote it a long time ago and never really…never really had the motivation or strength to look at it again. But I guess now is the time to look at it again.” He managed a small smile.

Jeongin couldn’t stop the smile from appearing on his face. “It is indeed!” He jumped up, suddenly full of adrenaline and excitement. “Let’s go, then! Let’s find your list and start working through it. I’ll call Felix and maybe Hyunjin too and we can all go together! It’ll be the best time of your life, I promise you! We’re going to _live_ a little!”

Woojin smiled back at that. He took a deep breath as though to steel himself and stood up. “Alright. Let’s do it.”

Jeongin couldn’t help letting out a little cheer and lunging across the table to throw his arms around Woojin. Woojin let out a panicked shout about knocking his cup of tea over, but Jeongin ignored him. He was too busy grinning from ear to ear and hugging Woojin as tight as he could. Eventually Woojin just sighed and hugged him back, though Jeongin knew he was smiling.

He still knocked over the cup of tea though and had to clean it up later.

*

“So.” Felix started ticking things off on his fingers. “We’ve done zip-lining, snuck into an R-rated movie, shoplifted, stared at some massive painting in a museum for, like, five hours, screamed into the void on the top of a cliff, dyed our hair, and played hide-and-seek in a Costco, all within three days.” He grinned. “Who knew our Woojinnie had such a wild streak?”

Woojin rolled his eyes, though he was smiling. Jeongin had to admit, the blue that Woojin had chosen to dye his hair really did suit him. It reminded Jeongin of the Celestial Sphere, but in a good way.

Meanwhile Jeongin’s hair was a light pink that he had chosen purely because it looked fun. According to Hyunjin, it looked like cotton candy. Whatever that was.

“I’m still stuck on the shoplifting one,” Hyunjin said, currently laying across the couch with his head in Jeongin’s lap. “Like, what made you want to steal a pocket watch of all things?”

Woojin shrugged as he pulled out the tiny golden pocket watch. “Just felt like it. I feel a little bad, but it’s so pretty.”

Hyunjin snorted at that.

“So, what next?” Jeongin asked Woojin.

“Yeah, what crime do we get to do next?” Hyunjin asked. He suddenly gasped, his eyes going wide. “Art heist! We could totally pull off an art heist!”

“We’re not doing an art heist,” Woojin said.

“Aw, c’mon, they’re so sexy though.” Hyunjin pouted.

Woojin arched an eyebrow.

Felix nudged Woojin playfully. “C’mon. What’s next on your bucket list?”

Woojin thought for a moment before looking away. “I guess I’ve always wanted to travel.”

“Okay!” Felix said. “Where’s one place in the world you’ve always wanted to go?”

Woojin didn’t look at them as he fidgeted with the pocket watch. “Australia.”

Hyunjin stiffened at that.

“It _is_ pretty there,” Felix agreed, nodding. “Honestly, if I could live anywhere, I’d live in Australia. It feels like home to me, you know?”

Woojin smiled at that, though Jeongin could see the sad, longing look in his eyes. It made Jeongin frown.

“Why Australia?” Jeongin asked.

He could tell that Woojin was going to deflect and not give him a clear answer. He was preparing for something along the lines of _Oh, I just want to_ or _It just sounds nice, you know?_

He was totally caught off-guard when Woojin said, “It’s not really the place. It’s for the people. One person, specifically.”

Felix and Jeongin exchanged wide-eyed glances. Felix hadn’t expected that answer either.

“A person?” Jeongin asked timidly.

Woojin nodded, and Jeongin and Felix exchanged glances again.

“Who is it?” Jeongin asked.

“One of my mistakes,” Woojin said with a sigh. He looked up at Jeongin, though his eyes were full of so much heartbreak and sadness and guilt that it was almost overwhelming. “I’ve spent so much time avoiding it. Running away from it. But it’s time to face it. Before it’s too late.”

Jeongin wanted to ask him more questions, to learn more about this mystery person, but Felix reached out and took Woojin’s hand before giving Jeongin a look that said, _later. There will be time for that later._ It took effort to restrain himself, but Jeongin clamped his mouth shut and nodded.

“I’ll book us flights first thing in the morning,” Felix told Woojin, smiling. He looked at Hyunjin curiously. “I’m assuming you’re coming with…?”

“If that’s okay,” Hyunjin said, looking at Woojin nervously. “If you don’t want me to come, I understand.”

“Jeongin’s going to bawl his eyes out if I don’t let you come, so…” Woojin rolled his eyes.

Jeongin made an indignant noise of protest, while Hyunjin just grinned.

“True,” Hyunjin said.

“Hey!” Jeongin turned on Hyunjin.

“Love you,” Hyunjin said lightly. It was so casual and the conversation moved on so easily afterwards that no one even noticed how pink Jeongin turned or how that simple statement had rendered him silent for the rest of the night.

Later that night, when Hyunjin was getting ready to leave, he hugged Jeongin and said, “Thanks again for letting me tag along during all of this. I’ve had so much fun the past few days, you have no idea.”

Jeongin hugged him back and said, “I want you here, Hyunjin. Plus none of us would be able to navigate this world without you.”

Hyunjin smiled and pulled back so he could see Jeongin’s face. That smile turned somewhat sad as he asked softly, “Are you doing okay?”

Jeongin glanced over his shoulder where Woojin was finishing cleaning up the kitchen and already heading down the hall to get ready for bed. He gave a small, sad smile that mirrored Hyunjin’s and nodded. “Yeah. It still hurts sometimes. I realized a few days ago that I don’t think I’ve ever seen Woojin have such a big, happy smile before. It kind of stung.”

“He’s not really going away, though,” Hyunjin said. “He’ll be up in the sky, watching over you. He’ll be able to talk to you just like the sun and moon can.”

“Yeah, but I won’t get to hug him.” Jeongin pouted. “It’ll just be very…different. I’m not sure I’ll like it.”

“No, probably not,” Hyunjin agreed. “But it’ll be okay. I promise.”

Jeongin just nodded.

Hyunjin gave him one last hug. “See you bright an early tomorrow morning,” he said brightly, pulling away. “I’ve never been to Australia.”

“Me either,” Jeongin said.

Hyunjin snorted. “Guess we’ll discover it together.”

“Guess we will.” Jeongin smiled.

“Night, Innie.”

“Night, Hyunjin.”

With one last smile, Hyunjin turned and left the apartment.

*

The flight to Australia was a long one. Hyunjin initially planned to sleep through the whole thing, but that plan sort of went out the window when Felix revealed that their seats weren’t together. Two of them were on one side, two of them were on the other. Hyunjin wanted to sit next to Jeongin, but Jeongin wanted to sit next to Woojin. Obviously that meant Hyunjin was stuck with Felix, which wasn’t bad. Hyunjin liked Felix. He had just wanted to be there for Jeongin to talk him through the entire process of flying. Instead, Woojin did all of that.

Hyunjin should have been somewhat relieved, since that meant he could just sit back and try to relax during this insanely long flight. But instead he was wired and restless. He kept glancing over at Jeongin and Woojin, who were smiling at each other and laughing and enjoying each other’s company on the flight. He wondered what they were talking about. He wished he could talk to Jeongin right now.

Instead, he turned to look at Felix sitting next to him.

“Hey,” Hyunjin said.

“Hey, hey,” Felix said without looking up from the Nintendo Switch he had brought along.

“You’re supposed to be super powerful, right?”

“I suppose.”

“Why can’t you heal Woojin, then?”

Felix paused and as a result died on the classic Super Mario game he was playing. He sighed and turned to look at Hyunjin. “I don’t have unlimited power,” he said. “I have my limitations, just like everyone.”

“You turned Jeongin into a fox—how can you not turn Woojin healthy again?”

“It all starts with a wish,” Felix said. “I can’t do anything unless someone says ‘I wish’ out loud. Then it comes down to needs and wants. Can’t grant wants. Can only grant needs. Really limits my power if you think about it.”

Hyunjin frowned. “So how was Jeongin’s wish a _need_ and not a want? He theorized that he’d fade away completely if you didn’t grant his wish—is that true?”

Felix shrugged. “I don’t know, honestly. We can’t know the things that could have been. There’s a possibility he would have faded away completely. But, honestly, he needed a friend. And so did you.”

“What?”

“Sometimes I can see a little bit into the future to help figure out if a wish is a need or a want. In Jeongin’s case, he _needed_ to be down on Earth because he needed to find you and Woojin.”

Hyunjin frowned at that.

“You needed a friend at the time,” Felix said. “You needed a reason to continue living. Jeongin was that reason.”

Hyunjin swallowed back the wave of tears that suddenly sprang up at the mention of his suicidal thoughts. “So then Jeongin doesn’t _need_ Woojin to live? That’s just a want? Woojin doesn’t _need_ to keep living? Is that what you’re saying?”

Felix shook his head. “It’s messy. I don’t always see how it will work out. I just have to trust my power. In this case, my powers won’t work on Woojin.” His face fell. “I already tried.”

Hyunjin blinked in surprise. “You did? When?”

“The night we found out.” Felix’s eyes were so full of sadness and guilt. He suddenly looked so much older, like he really was some immortal, all-powerful being. “When Jeongin ran off and you went to go comfort him. I tried to get Woojin to wish that he was healed. He wouldn’t do it.”

“Why wouldn’t he wish to be better?” Hyunjin whispered.

“He doesn’t want to live anymore. He’s like you—he doesn’t see the point of it.” Felix gave a sad smile. “He’s been around for a very long time, Hyunjin. He’s exhausted. The Celestial Sphere and Earth weren’t very good to him in the long run.”

“How can he say that?” Hyunjin demanded. “He has his own business and his own home and he has Jeongin and you and other friends. Not to mention how Jeongin talks about how his face lights up whenever he finds a new book or comes back from visiting his writer friends. How can he not want to live anymore?”

“I don’t have the answer to that,” Felix said. “You’ll have to ask Woojin.”

Hyunjin huffed at that.

Felix gave a small, fleeting smile before saying, “I can tell you what I think, though.”

Hyunjin raised his eyebrows expectantly.

“I think he’s a lot like you,” Felix said. “I think he has a hole in his heart that can’t be filled no matter what he does.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“He’s unhappy. Empty. Unsatisfied. You can have all the things in the world and still not be happy. I suppose that’s just life.” Felix looked back at his game. “But if you ask me, I think that’s why we’re going to Australia.”

When Hyunjin just frowned at him, Felix looked up and gave another fleeting smirk.

“Think about it,” Felix said. “Just…really think about it. We have time, after all.” Then he started playing his game again.

Hyunjin did think about it. He thought about how solitary Woojin was. He thought about how many books Woojin read and how he preferred to stay in his own little part of the world. He thought about what Woojin said to Jeongin the night they came home from the hospital, how he didn’t want Jeongin to make the same mistakes and get hurt. He thought about how Jeongin said how lonely the Celestial Sphere was and how Felix said that Earth wasn’t much better. Then he thought about the fact that they were going across the world for one person whom Woojin wouldn’t name or say anything about.

Hyunjin shook his head at himself. Sometimes, he could be really dense. The answer was right in front of him.

Someone at some point had broken Woojin’s heart. Someone Woojin probably cared about a lot. And Woojin probably never truly recovered from it. Probably never found anything else like that, which led to that hole in his heart. That unsatisfied feeling. That emptiness.

That loneliness.

He and Hyunjin really were the same, weren’t they?

This was all just theorizing, though. If Hyunjin wanted to know the truth, he would have to ask Woojin himself. Which was a lot easier said than done.

He decided he would have to wait for the right time. Until then, he would simply just watch for any evidence that supported his and Felix’s theory.

With that, he tried to sleep for the rest of the flight. He caught a few hours of sleep and dreamed of Jeongin.

*

They landed in Sydney, Australia, got through the airport, and caught a ride to their hotel with minimal problems. As they drove through the streets, Jeongin couldn’t help noticing that Australia looked similar to home. Sure, there were some differences, like the fact that it was winter here and summer back home, but if he thought about it, he could still imagine that he was at home and just in a different part of the city.

At one point, they caught sight of the ocean.

Jeongin’s eyes widened at the massive expanse of blue flickering in between the buildings as they passed. He had never seen the ocean from down here before. It was beautiful and terrifying all at once, especially when he remembered that Earth was more blue than anything. These oceans took up more surface area of the planet than land did. So, so big…and mysterious…and dangerous.

Hyunjin must have noticed him staring owl-eyed at everything, because he smiled and said, “We can go to the beach later, Innie.”

“It might be too cold to get into the water, though,” Felix said.

Woojin snorted at that. “Sixty degrees is _not_ cold.”

“It is if you’re trying to go swimming.”

“I wonder if the water is warm,” Hyunjin said, leaning across Jeongin a bit to look out the window with him. Jeongin smiled at their close proximity.

All of this was such a new experience for Jeongin. He had never flown before. He had never had to go through airport security. He had never had to sit crammed into a metal cylinder with wings and smiling flight attendants who apparently sold packets of peanuts and little cups of water for five bucks each. It was overwhelming, but not in his usual sense. Actually, he hadn’t felt like he was going to shift at all throughout the entire trip, which gave him a little boost of pride at himself. He was finally gaining control.

He knew that definitely would not have been the case had he not sat next to Woojin. Woojin was so calm and knowledgable that Jeongin didn’t feel panicked at all, not even when they took off or hit turbulence. Plus he got to talk with Woojin for hours upon hours and then use his shoulder as a pillow when he got too tired. Really, he hated the circumstances that led to this trip, but he was so glad he finally got to spend this quality time with Woojin.

Hotels were also completely foreign to Jeongin. They were so big. With weird art on the walls. Some of the hallways smelled a bit like cigarette smoke, but most of the place smelled like fresh sheets and laundry detergent. Jeongin took a deep breath as they walked through the hallway to their rooms and smiled.

“Two rooms, each with two queen beds,” Felix said, smiling at Jeongin’s excited expression. “I figured Jeongin and Woojin in one room, me and Hyunjin in the other.”

“Yep,” Jeongin said with a smile.

He almost missed the pout Hyunjin made.

Woojin noticed it and smiled. “I’m fine with rooming with Felix if the two lovebirds want their own room.”

“What?” Jeongin sputtered, turning bright red.

“Don’t call us that,” Hyunjin said, though he was turning just as red as Jeongin. Neither of them would meet each other’s gaze. “We’re just _friends_.”

“Uh huh, yeah, sure.” Woojin handed them their keycard and gave them a little shove towards their room. “Let’s unpack and get settled in, then plan to go get some dinner in an hour or so.”

“I’m going to take a _nap_ ,” Felix declared, kicking open the door to his and Woojin’s room and marching inside. Jeongin peeked through the doorway just in time to see Felix launch himself onto one massive bed.

“See you in a bit,” Hyunjin said as he unlocked their room.

Woojin shot Jeongin a knowing smile, making Jeongin turn an even _deeper_ shade of red (which he didn’t think was even _possible_ ) before they both went into their respective rooms.

It was a decent-sized room, probably twice the size of Jeongin’s back at home. It had two queen beds, a dresser, a desk, and a TV. The bathroom was unnecessarily large too, seeming to be the exact same size as the room itself. It smelled so clean and fresh that Jeongin couldn’t help smiling at the sight of it. His smile only widened after Hyunjin dumped his stuff on his bed and went right over to the windows, revealing that they weren’t _just_ windows—there was also a balcony.

Hyunjin flung open the door and stepped out onto the balcony, only to excitedly shout, “Hey, Innie, look! You can see the ocean from here!”

“Really?” Jeongin dropped his stuff on the other bed and ran out to stand next to Hyunjin. He grinned as he could just barely see the massive blue with a bit of the white sand peek out from beyond the city. “It’s beautiful.”

Hyunjin was smiling at him. “Yeah,” he said. “Beautiful.”

Jeongin looked at him and grinned. “I can’t wait to go to the beach.”

“You probably won’t get to swim, but it’ll be fun to walk along the water.” Hyunjin looked back at the city, resting his forearms on the railing. Jeongin mirrored him and tried not to lean into him. They were already standing so close—he could easily just lean over and rest his shoulder against Hyunjin’s. Maybe Hyunjin would be fine with that—that could be another thing that all friends do—but Jeongin still held back.

“I wonder who Woojin’s here to see,” Hyunjin murmured. A breeze picked up and tousled his hair.

Jeongin shrugged. “Guess we’ll find out. I hope he’s happy, though.”

“Me too,” Hyunjin said, sighing. “Me too.”

They lost track of how long they stood out there, watching the city, enjoying the sunlight and breeze on their faces. Before they knew it, Felix was knocking on their door and telling them it was time for dinner.

Dinner was fun. They had good food and had amusing conversations. Jeongin enjoyed it, but his favorite part was their walk along the beach later that night, right after the sun had set.

He _loved_ the ocean. Loved the sight of it, loved the smell, loved the feeling of that cool breeze that came off of it. He loved the feeling of the sand on his bare feet and briefly wondered what it would be like to shift into his fox form and roll in the sand that way. He’d get sand _everywhere._ Hyunjin would probably laugh and coo at him. Woojin would probably yell. Felix would probably roll in the sand with him—and he didn’t even have an animal form to shift into.

“You’re so lucky it’s dark and cold out, otherwise I would totally shove you into the water right now,” Hyunjin told Jeongin as he walked alongside him.

“What?” Jeongin let out a surprised laugh.

Hyunjin smiled at him. “It’s just a shitty thing to do as friends. Plus it’s funny.”

Jeongin snorted and gave him a little shove. It wasn’t hard at all, but Hyunjin—being the overly dramatic piece of shit he was—let out a loud gasp and fell right to the ground. Jeongin just stopped walking long enough to stare down at him and shake his head. Then he started walking again.

“You know what else people do when they walk on the beach!” Hyunjin bounced back and skipped alongside Jeongin as though nothing had happened. “Hold hands!”

“That seems too romantic,” Jeongin said, even though his heart ached with longing to hold Hyunjin’s hand.

“So?”

“You’ve made it very clear numerous times that we’re _friends_ , not anything more.”

“Friends can hold hands,” Hyunjin said. “We’ve held hands before. Come on, come on.” He reached for Jeongin’s hand, but Jeongin pulled his hand away quickly, out of instinct.

Hyunjin blinked in surprise, a flash of hurt and confusion crossing his face.

“Sorry,” Jeongin blurted. “I just—um—I mean—we can hold hands.” He quickly held out his hand, but Hyunjin shook his head.

“No, you’re right, it’s…weird to do that as friends. I’m the one who should be sorry for suggesting it.” Hyunjin crossed his arms tightly across his chest and stared down at the sand.

“Sorry,” Jeongin whispered again, since he couldn’t help it.

Hyunjin just shrugged.

They fell into an awkward silence, during which they stayed at least two feet away from each other and didn’t speak or even look at each other. It was only broken when Woojin and Felix caught up with them, who started a conversation and brought Jeongin and Hyunjin into it. But Jeongin and Hyunjin still didn’t speak to each other directly. Woojin and Felix must have noticed, but they chose not to remark on it.

Jeongin and Hyunjin didn’t really say much for the rest of the night, not even when they were getting ready for bed.

It was _only_ when Jeongin couldn’t sleep because he was still trying to adjust to this time zone that he broke this strange silence. He sighed and rolled over to face Hyunjin’s bed. Hyunjin was currently sleeping with his back to Jeongin. Jeongin whispered loudly anyways, “Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin just grunted in response.

“Are you asleep?”

Another grunt.

“Was that a yes or a no?”

Hyunjin sighed before looking over his shoulder. “If I were asleep would I really be able to answer your questions?”

“Maybe?” Jeongin asked.

Hyunjin snorted.

“I can’t sleep,” Jeongin said.

“Count sheep.”

“What?”

“Count sheep.”

“Why would I count sheep?”

“I dunno, it’s something humans do when they can’t sleep. It’s supposed to wear you out.”

“Why sheep though? Why not something else?”

“I dunno, more people used to own sheep so they’d have to count them constantly to make sure some wolf didn’t drag one off.”

“And they fell asleep doing that?”

Hyunjin snorted again but said, “Maybe they were so used to counting sheep in the day that when they went to bed it was something they just did out of habit? I dunno.”

“Do you ever count sheep?”

“No, because this conversation is exhausting me enough.”

Jeongin couldn’t help grinning at that. “Hey, Hyunjin.”

“What.”

“Can I sleep next to you?”

There was a beat of silence before Hyunjin twisted to look over his shoulder again. “What?”

“Never mind.” Jeongin looked away quickly.

“No, wait—”

“That’d be weird.”

“ _Jeongin._ ” Hyunjin huffed. “Get your ass over here.”

Jeongin perked up a little. “Really?”

“Yes, you little shit.” Hyunjin patted the mattress next to him and even pulled back the covers.

Jeongin didn’t waste any time jumping up and slipping into bed next to Hyunjin. He left space in between the two of them, even though he desperately wanted to wrap his arms around Hyunjin’s waist and press his face into his back.

Hyunjin adjusted the sheets over Jeongin but didn’t roll over to face him. Both of them settled down and fell into silence for several minutes. Jeongin thought that Hyunjin had fallen asleep and couldn’t help heaving a deep sigh.

“What,” Hyunjin said.

“Nothing,” Jeongin said. “Just…breathing.”

“That seemed like a pretty deep breath.”

“It was. But maybe I’m just trying to settle down and sleep.”

“You can shift if you want.”

Jeongin paused before asking, “Do you want me to?”

Hyunjin shrugged one shoulder. “It’s up to you.”

Jeongin couldn’t help huffing at that, making Hyunjin look over his shoulder again.

“What?” Hyunjin asked.

“Nothing,” Jeongin said.

“Are you going to shift, then?”

Jeongin hesitated, but then shook his head.

“Alright,” is all Hyunjin said before settling down again.

This time only a minute or so of silence passed before Jeongin whispered again, “Hyunjin.”

“What.”

“Can I hug you?”

“I thought the whole reason you came over here was to cuddle.”

“So…is that a yes?”

Hyunjin snorted but said, “Yes, Jeongin.”

Jeongin exhaled in relief and scooted forward. He closed those last few inches of space in between them by hugging Hyunjin from behind and pressing his face into Hyunjin’s back just like he had wanted to.

This time, he waited for several minutes more, listening to the sounds of Hyunjin’s breathing, waiting until he was sure Hyunjin was asleep. Then he whispered, “I love you.”

He felt Hyunjin stiffen, and his heart leapt into his throat. He held his breath, waiting for Hyunjin to pull away or wake up, but Hyunjin did none of those things. Hyunjin stayed completely still, fooling Jeongin into thinking he really was still asleep.

That is, until, Hyunjin said, “I know.”

“I thought you were asleep,” Jeongin said, his throat tightening.

“I know,” Hyunjin said. He took a deep breath and finally moved away from Jeongin, forcing Jeongin to release him. Once there was at least a foot in between them, Hyunjin rolled over and propped himself up with one elbow to look down at Jeongin. “I know that when you say ‘I love you’ you mean it as more than just friends.”

Jeongin stared up at him, his heart pounding. If this were a movie or a book from Woojin’s bookstore, then right now Hyunjin would say that he wanted to be more than just friends. That he loved Jeongin in the same way.

But this wasn’t a movie or a book, and Jeongin knew what Hyunjin was going to say even before he said it.

“I can’t, Jeongin,” Hyunjin whispered. “I just—I don’t see you in that way. And I _can’t_ see you in that way. I—I can’t.”

Now Jeongin wished he had just tried counting sheep instead. He looked away, his face and eyes burning.

“But you know that too, don’t you?” Hyunjin said.

“I don’t think I can ever see you as just a friend,” Jeongin whispered.

Hyunjin’s expression was sad but not surprised. “So then maybe we can’t be friends.”

“Maybe.”

Another beat of silence passed. Neither of them met each other’s gaze.

Jeongin broke it by swinging his legs over the side of the bed and standing. Instead of going to his bed, though, he grabbed his keycard and went to the door.

“Where are you going?” Hyunjin asked.

“To Woojin’s room,” Jeongin said. He didn’t wait for Hyunjin to respond. He just left.

Woojin let him in immediately. He didn’t even say anything as he led Jeongin over to his bed, where the lamp was still on and a book was set to the side.

Jeongin crawled in after him, wrapped his arms around Woojin’s waist, and dropped his head into the crook of Woojin’s neck. “I think I messed up again,” he whispered.

“I know,” Woojin said.

“You do?”

“The walls are thin and you and Hyunjin aren’t exactly quiet.”

Jeongin really felt like crying at that point, but he refused. He refused to cry at every single hardship anymore.

“I will say,” Woojin turned a page, “that this is really going to make the rest of the trip extremely awkward.”

Jeongin just sighed and didn’t respond.

It took a long time to fall asleep, and when he did fall asleep, he dreamed he was sleeping in the same bed as Hyunjin, with his arms wrapped around him instead.

*

Even in completely different time zones, Woojin woke up before Jisung. After all, he had something to do.

He gently pried Jeongin’s arms from around his waist and slipped out of bed, his heart twisting with love and sympathy for the poor kid. His face was so troubled, even as he slept. Woojin sincerely hoped he and Hyunjin worked things out. Otherwise he might need to smack some sense into Hyunjin before he expired.

Silently, he grabbed his keycard and shoes and slipped out of the hotel room.

The walk to the beach was a peaceful one. There were few people out this early in the morning. Plus, the air smelled so fresh and sweet, with the faintest hint of the ocean. Woojin breathed in deeply and smiled as he walked, his hands in his pockets.

Overhead, Minho was still up. He watched as Woojin walked down the street and said, “I found him. He should be there soon.”

“Thank you, Minho,” Woojin said, smiling up at him. “I couldn’t have done this without you.”

Minho’s faint face in the moon seemed sadder than usual. “I wish it didn’t have to be like this.”

“It’s just life,” Woojin said.

“Yeah, but you could easily just come back up here. I’d keep you company. You don’t have to die with that body.”

Woojin’s smile turned sad too. “I’ve made my choice. I’ve lived long enough.”

Minho didn’t respond to that.

By the time Woojin reached the beach, the sky was lightening. Jisung would be here soon. The beach, of course, was just as empty as the streets. Woojin was glad for it. He strolled along the path running parallel to the sand, looking for one specific bench. It wasn’t difficult to find. It was blue, the back of it curved into wave designs, and it faced the ocean. Woojin sat down on it and waited.

He knew he wouldn’t have to wait for long, and he was right. Before the sun peeked over the horizon, a lone figure appeared on the horizon, keeping a steady pace as they jogged in Woojin’s direction. Woojin watched out of the corner of his eye until the figure came close enough for him to make out their features. Then he looked towards the ocean, his throat already constricting from the surge of emotions just from that short glimpse.

The bleached blonde hair was new. But everything else was the same. The same toned body. The same beautifully-sculpted face, with the plump lips and somewhat large nose and warm, soft eyes. And—they weren’t there now, since the face was too serious and focused, but there were familiar dimples on that face that appeared with a particularly large smile. Just the memory of them made Woojin’s heart clench.

Maybe this was a mistake. Too many painful memories. But this was the last thing Woojin wanted to do on Earth—before he died, he just wanted to see Chan’s face again.

And now he had. He could die peacefully now.

Woojin closed his eyes tightly and forced the memories away as the sound of footsteps pounding against the pavement drew closer. Eventually they slowed to a stop, right by the bench Woojin sat on. Woojin waited for the footsteps to start again, this time going back the way they came. But instead, a bright, friendly voice said, “Great view, right?”

Woojin couldn’t believe it. He opened his eyes and turned to look at the person standing several feet away, still panting from their run, but a dimpled smile on their face regardless as they looked at Woojin.

_Chan._

Woojin searched for recognition in Chan’s eyes but of course found none. He smiled back at Chan anyways, saying, “The best.”

“You from here?” Chan asked.

“Nope,” Woojin said. “Just visiting. Always wanted to see Australia. Now I can say I have.”

“Well, it’s a big country so I’d hardly say you’ve really _seen_ it, but that’s definitely a chunk of it.” Chan gestured to the ocean. “This is one of my favorite spots.”

 _I know,_ Woojin thought to himself, smiling.

“This is the best time to be here, by the way,” Chan said. “Right before all the other tourists wake up and start crawling all over the place.” He grinned and winked. “A little advice from a local.”

“I appreciate it,” Woojin said with a smile.

Chan’s brow furrowed for a moment before he tilted his head to one side. “Have we met before?”

Woojin’s heart leapt in his chest, and he couldn’t stop the surprise from showing on his face.

Because of Woojin’s reaction, Chan quickly added, “It’s just—you look really familiar.” His brow furrowed further as he studied Woojin’s face, trying to place it. He’d never be able to.

“So do you,” Woojin lied. As if he would ever forget Chan’s face. He put on a joking smile that had an edge of sadness to it. “Maybe we met in another life and that’s why we recognize each other.”

Anyone else would give him a weird look, especially since he was a complete stranger to Chan, but Chan just nodded thoughtfully, seeming to truly consider it. Of course he considered it. He was a sucker for that soulmate theory. Woojin used to roll his eyes whenever Chan told him that he thought of him as his soulmate. Now it just made Woojin’s heart break all over again.

“Maybe,” Chan said. “Or maybe our paths are just meant to cross?” He scrunched up his face. “That’s weird, right? Too weird to say to someone you’ve just met. Sorry about that.” He gave an awkward little laugh.

Woojin shrugged. “It’s a possibility. That our paths are meant to cross, I mean.”

“Really?” Chan’s eyebrows shot upwards as a smile appeared on his face again. “Well, in that case, it wouldn’t be weird if I asked if you’d like to come get coffee with me, then, would it?”

Woojin gave a small smile. He wanted to. He wanted to more than anything. But he couldn’t. He didn’t have the time.

“It wouldn’t be weird at all,” Woojin said. “But unfortunately I can’t. I have a whole day planned. This was the only time of day I could carve out for myself.”

“Ah, alright then.” Chan nodded, even though his shoulders drooped a little. “That’s alright. Who knows? Maybe our paths will cross again.” He smiled.

Woojin smiled back, knowing they never would. “Maybe they will.”

“I’m Chan, by the way.” Chan held out his hand.

Woojin stood from the bench and stepped over to him. “Woojin,” he said, shaking Chan’s hand. It was as warm and soft as he remembered, with those few calluses.

Chan blinked and frowned. “Woojin,” he repeated, mostly to himself. He studied Woojin before shaking his head slowly. “I swear I’ve never known anyone else with that name before, but it sounds so familiar.”

 _You used to say it all the time_ , Woojin thought sadly.

“Weird,” is all he said.

“Yeah, really weird.” Chan studied him for a few moments more before giving a little laugh. “Sorry, I’m staring. Uh—” he realized he was still holding Woojin’s hand and quickly dropped it. “Sorry.”

“It was nice to meet you,” Woojin said.

“Yeah.” Chan smiled, dimples on full display. “It was nice to meet you too, Woojin. Until next time, I guess.”

“Until next time,” Woojin said, knowing there would never be a next time.

Chan smiled at him for a few moments, though something flickered in his eyes. Something that looked almost like recognition. But it went by too quickly. Woojin wasn’t sure if he had seen it at all.

Eventually, though, Chan looked down at his watch. “Oh, damn, I need to be at work in twenty minutes and it’s a fifteen-minute run back to my place. Shoot! Bad timing on my part.” He laughed, then looked up at Woojin. “Bye, Woojin.” Then, with a little wave, he took off jogging back the way he came.

“Bye,” Woojin said, watching him run away. A single tear slipped down his cheek. “Chan.”

With great difficulty, he turned and started the lonely walk back to the hotel.

He never even realized that a little fox had been watching him the entire time.

*

Jeongin just barely made it back to the hotel before Woojin did. He shifted in the alleyway beside the hotel before running inside and up the stairs. He fumbled with Felix’s keycard he had borrowed and all but fell into Woojin and Felix’s hotel room. He scared the shit out of Felix, who was just waking up.

“Jesus!” Felix pressed a hand to his chest. “Don’t do that! Nearly gave me a heart attack.”

When Jeongin responded by staring at him with wide eyes, Felix just frowned.

“What,” Felix asked.

“I just followed Woojin,” Jeongin said. “I saw him with someone.”

“With someone?” Felix raised his eyebrows. “Like, the someone we’re supposed to find here?”

Jeongin nodded.

“Yes?” Felix said.

But then Jeongin frowned as he thought about it and shook his head.

“No?” Felix said.

“I don’t know,” Jeongin said. And he didn’t. Not really. Sure, he had seen Woojin’s heartbroken expression. Sure, he had heard Woojin say something about meeting in another life. Sure, he had seen Woojin crying after saying goodbye. But none of it made _sense_.

The person being _Chan_ didn’t make sense. How the hell did Woojin know Chan? And how did Chan know Woojin? Or… _not_ know Woojin? Or did Woojin know Chan from his days up in the Celestial Sphere?

Jeongin gasped as an idea occurred to him. What if _Chan_ was why Woojin came down to Earth? What if Woojin saw him from the Celestial Sphere, fell in love with him, and found a way to be with him on Earth?

But if that were the case, then why did Chan still not know him? Did Woojin never make a move? Did he never approach Chan in all his years on Earth?

Jeongin was tempted to slam his head against the wall. He didn’t _know_. And he wondered if he would ever know. If Woojin would ever tell him. Knowing Woojin, he probably wouldn’t. And Jeongin didn’t know how to ask him about it without revealing that he was spying on him the entire time.

He decided that sulking on the bed was his best bet.

Woojin came in shortly after that, surprised to see both Felix and Jeongin awake.

Felix arched an eyebrow at him but said, “Morning. You’re up early.”

“Went for a walk,” is all Woojin said. He went over to his suitcase. “I was thinking we could sightsee today? Maybe go to the Sydney Opera House? Explore the city a bit? Or even spend a bit more time on the beach. We could even take a boat ride if we really wanted to.”

Felix and Jeongin exchanged glances.

“You want to go sightseeing?” Felix asked, frowning.

Woojin looked up, expression completely innocent. “Yes, why not?”

“It’s just—I thought you would want to see the person we came all this way for,” Felix said. “Maybe spend time with them?”

Woojin smiled. “There’s time for that later. For now, I want to sightsee. So, let’s get ready and get going. Jeongin, you should probably go get Hyunjin up. And tell him what the plan is for today.”

Jeongin groaned at that, remembering his and Hyunjin’s…conversation last night. It made him hate himself even more as he covered his face, remembering exactly what he had said and exactly what Hyunjin had said. If he was smart, he’d know that it was never going to happen with Hyunjin. He should just move on. But he was stubborn and stupid, so of course he never learned. He just kept believing the same things, and it ended the same way: with Jeongin confessing—again—and Hyunjin rejecting him— _again_.

Stupid. The whole thing was so stupid. _Jeongin_ was just so stupid.

“Wait, why are you in here?” Felix frowned at Jeongin now. “Were you here all night?”

“Yes, he and Hyunjin had a little…disagreement, unfortunately,” Woojin said, rummaging through his bag.

Felix arched an eyebrow at Jeongin, who just sighed.

“I’ll fix it,” he said, getting up and dragging himself to the door.

“Key,” Woojin said, tossing the keycard to Jeongin. Jeongin caught it with one hand and left the room.

He braced himself before opening his room, preparing an apology and a plan on how to go on from here. He opened the door, expecting to see Hyunjin still asleep. He was surprised to find Hyunjin awake already, even though he was still curled up in his bed, phone in hand. He didn’t even look up when Jeongin came in.

“Hi,” Jeongin said in a small voice, shutting the door behind him.

“Hi,” Hyunjin said without looking up.

An awkward silence followed. Jeongin kind of wanted to throw himself off the balcony right about now.

“Um,” he began, fidgeting with the keycard. “Woojin wants to go sightseeing today.”

“Kay,” is all Hyunjin said. He made no move to get up.

“You’ll come along, right?”

“There’s something else I want to do while I’m here,” Hyunjin said. “I’ll catch up with you guys later. Felix has my number. I’ll contact him. Or I’m sure the sun can spy on me for you.”

Jeongin wasn’t entirely sure what he was getting at, but he nodded anyways. “Oh, okay. Um, if you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Hyunjin said.

“Okay.”

Hyunjin glanced up and gave him a flash of a smile that wasn’t really a smile at all. Jeongin still wasn’t sure how to react to that, or how to end the next awkward silence that followed. He ended up just walking over to his suitcase and pulling out his clothes for the day. He didn’t say a single word to Hyunjin between the time he started to get ready and the time he walked out the door.

Felix and Woojin were waiting in the hallway outside. Both of them saw Jeongin’s sad, troubled expression and exchanged glances.

“Guessing that didn’t go very well,” Felix said.

“It just didn’t really… _go_.” Jeongin sighed. “Hyunjin says he has something he needs to do while he’s here. He’ll catch up with us later.”

Both Felix and Woojin looked surprised and skeptical about that. But to Jeongin’s surprise, they didn’t pry or try to change anyone’s mind. Instead, Felix took a deep breath, put on a smile, and launched into the happy chatter he could create on cue to fill the awkward silences and boost the mood. Today the chatter was all about what they were going to see and what food they were going to eat and if they ate outside by the ocean, were they going to get dive-bombed by some hungry seagulls?

Before they headed out of the hotel, Woojin reached out and squeezed his hand. Jeongin gave him a genuine smile, which Woojin returned. It was enough to remind Jeongin exactly why they were here. They were here for _Woojin._ To make _Woojin_ happy. Jeongin wasn’t here to sulk about his numerous problems with Hyunjin.

So, for the rest of the day, Jeongin decided to stop stressing about Hyunjin. It was better for everyone that way.

*

Hyunjin was…conflicted. Really conflicted.

So conflicted that he didn’t even realize what he was doing until he had the address pulled up on his phone, with the website and the hours and the phone number and everything, a result of extensive social media stalking. He took one look at it all and made a split-second decision that ended in him finally getting up and out of bed long after Jeongin and the others had left.

He really didn’t think about traveling though a foreign country by himself until he was actually doing it. It was somewhat stressful. He didn’t really give himself time to dwell on it too much. It was almost like he was in autopilot, like his brain was finally functioning like a normal, healthy brain and getting things _done_. What a concept.

He ended up at a front desk, where the lady sitting behind it frowned for a moment when he approached before smiling at him and asking how she could help.

“Hi,” Hyunjin said, leaning against the counter. “This is weird, I know, but does Dr. Bang have any openings today?”

“Uh,” the lady looked him up and down, “you are aware this is a _vet_ , yes? Not a hospital?”

“Yes,” Hyunjin said. “I just—”

“Hyunjin?”

Both the lady and Hyunjin looked in the direction of the new voice. There stood Chan, wearing his scrubs and lab coat, surprise playing out on his face.

“Hey,” Hyunjin said hoarsely.

“What are you doing here?” Chan asked.

“Looking for you.”

“For me?” Chan sighed. “I don’t think this is the best place to talk right now—”

“I know, that’s why I’m here to ask you when we _can_ talk.”

“I don’t know—”

“Please,” Hyunjin said. “It’s important.”

Chan sighed and ran a hand through his hair, looking conflicted and exhausted. “Well…I go on my lunch break in twenty minutes. I guess we can talk then. But it’ll only be for forty-five minutes at the most.”

“That’s perfect,” Hyunjin said.

Chan gave a stiff, polite smile that didn’t reach his eyes before gesturing towards the front doors. “There’s a café down the street. I’ll meet you there.”

Hyunjin nodded—a bit too enthusiastically. And he smiled a bit too widely. Chan just gave him a pitying look when Hyunjin told him goodbye and said he would see him soon.

After choosing a little circular table underneath an umbrella, out on the patio, he waited at the café for precisely twenty minutes. Chan showed up without his lab coat and just in his scrubs, which were slightly covered in dog and cat hair. A familiar look. Hyunjin’s heart ached a little at the sight, but not as much as it used to, which surprised him. He never realized how much the pain had faded away over the months apart.

“Hey,” Chan said, sliding into the seat across from Hyunjin.

Hyunjin smiled. “Hey,” he said.

Chan smiled back at him, though he looked a little uncomfortable, like he was unsure of what to say. “So,” he began.

“Do you want to order food first?” Hyunjin asked, standing. “I’ll pay.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Chan said.

“I want to, though.” Hyunjin smiled at him.

“Oh, okay, then.”

Chan ordered a sandwich and salad, and Hyunjin just got a salad. He wasn’t very hungry at the moment. Too focused on and worried about the things he wanted to discuss.

“So,” Chan said again, once they had sat back down with their food. “Uh, why are you in Australia? You didn’t…” He paused, his brow furrowing, his eyes filling with something like trepidation. “You didn’t come all this way for me, did you?”

“No, actually.” Hyunjin gave him a reassuring smile. “I came with a friend. His, um, his best friend is dying. We’re crossing off things on his bucket list.”

“Oh my god.” Chan’s eyes practically doubled in size at that. “Oh my god, that’s awful. Are you okay?”

Hyunjin nodded. “Yeah, I’m honestly not that close to him, but my friend is. I think it’s really going to be hard for him when…when the time comes. But I’ll be there for him.”

Chan nodded slowly, his eyes so wide and concerned and a little sad. He always felt so much for people, even for people he didn’t know. He had such a beautiful heart. One of the many things Hyunjin loved about him.

Hyunjin swallowed before saying, “I came to see you, though, because I just…” He sighed. “I need closure, Chan.”

When Chan didn’t say anything and instead stared down at his food, Hyunjin rushed on.

“I just need answers, I guess,” he said. “I need to hear them from you.”

“You deserve that,” Chan agreed quietly, still not looking at him.

“I’ll answer whatever questions you have for me,” Hyunjin said, even though he knew Chan probably didn’t have any.

Chan glanced up and gave a small, brief smile. “I just have one. Are you doing okay?”

Hyunjin snorted. “That’s a dumb question, Chan.”

“I know, I just…I just wanted to hope. I guess it would help the guilt a little bit.”

“The guilt? So you feel guilty about breaking my heart and moving across the world?” Hyunjin didn’t meant to sound so accusatory. It just…slipped. A lot of pent-up emotions were finally being released.

Chan cringed but nodded. “Of course I do. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.”

“You made it sound so easy,” Hyunjin scoffed. But he took a deep breath and forced himself to calm down before continuing. “Did you…did you mean it when you said you loved me?”

“Yes,” Chan said without missing a beat. “I meant it all, Hyunjin. And I don’t regret any of it. I loved you, I really did. And I still care about you. I care about you a lot.”

“If you loved me so much, then why did you leave?” Hyunjin asked. “Why didn’t you ask me to come to Australia with you? You could have shown me all of your favorite places, all the places you used to talk about. You could have shown me your home. You know I would have dropped everything to go with you, right? Without hesitation.”

“I know,” Chan said. “I missed home. You knew that. But…” He sighed and ran a hand through his curls. “I just…I don’t know how to phrase this without it sounding terrible.”

“Say it,” Hyunjin said. “I can take it.”

Chan’s expression was so sad and so full of guilt, but he spoke anyways, after a moment. “I wasn’t happy.”

Hyunjin’s brow furrowed. “How?”

“I don’t know.” Chan shook his head. “I really don’t know. I had a good job. My dream job. I got to work with cute animals all day. I had a loving boyfriend whom I loved back. I was financially stable. But something just felt… _wrong_. I thought it was homesickness, so I moved back. It was a rough couple of months. Part of it I knew was from our breakup. I missed you more than anything when I first moved here. And I’m not just saying that. I really, really missed you. So much that I almost moved back.”

Hyunjin’s eyes were filling with tears, but there was a kind of sadness in Chan’s eyes, a kind of deep, deep exhaustion that Hyunjin knew so well. It was like looking into a mirror. Maybe that’s why his heart ached differently. Chan’s words stung, but mostly because they were exactly what Hyunjin felt.

“I stayed here anyways,” Chan continued, exhaling slowly. “I thought it was just a rough adjustment period. That it would pass soon. But it never did.” He looked at Hyunjin. “I just feel like my life is missing something. Like it lost its spark a long time ago. I can’t remember when I lost it. I think I just let it fade away without realizing it, and now I have no idea how to get it back. I’ve tried everything. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

It took Hyunjin a few tries to speak, his throat swelling up with too much emotion that he couldn’t get the words out. Finally, though, he said, “I know exactly how you feel. I’ve felt like that for a long time.”

Chan managed a sad, grateful smile. “I think a lot of people have.” He sniffed and glanced away before saying, “It’s strange, though. Some days I can find that spark again, even though it doesn’t really last. Sometimes it’s little things, here and there. Like the way the sky or sea look. Or some cute thing an animal did at work, or some really nice thing a perfect stranger did. Sometimes it’s even just eating good food and being able to get a good night’s rest. It’s things like that that kind of remind me that there are some things to be happy about. To live for.”

Hyunjin nodded slowly, thinking about all the small things that kept him living. A smile made its way onto his face. “I understand that. I’ve been finding a lot more of those small things lately, actually.”

“Yeah?” Chan raised his eyebrows, smiling. “I bet Baby helps a lot with that. He’s still around, right?”

“Yeah, he’s around. But it’s because of my friend who I came with, actually. I’ve only known him for a little bit, but…I felt like I’ve known him for much longer.”

“You just click.”

Hyunjin nodded again. “We do. He makes me feel alive, honestly. Or, I guess I should say that he makes me want to _be_ alive. He makes me want to make the effort to live a little.”

“He sounds like a good friend,” Chan said.

“He is.” Hyunjin sighed, his shoulders drooping. “But I don’t think I’m a very good friend back.”

“Why not?”

“I’ve hurt him a lot. Not intentionally, but…he sees me as more than a friend. And I just…I don’t see him that way.”

“The way you described him kind of begs to differ.” Chan smirked.

Hyunjin blinked at him. “What?”

“Now, I’m not going to be _that_ person and say that strong feelings like that can only be romantic—they can totally be platonic too—but I know you, Hyunjin. I know how you used to talk about Seungmin. You don’t…you don’t look like that when you’re talking about this new friend. It’s just a thought, though.”

Hyunjin frowned at that. “I treat my new friend just like I would Seungmin, though.”

“Do you?” Chan looked skeptical, but he was smirking.

“Yeah, I—” Hyunjin stopped, his eyes going wide as he thought of all the ways he interacted with Jeongin. Holding hands, practically laying on each other whenever they could, cuddling when they slept, getting jealous whenever the other paid a little too much attention to someone else, telling each other how they had gained strength and courage from loving each other—wait a second.

“Yeah,” Chan said, smiling now as he watched Hyunjin come to terms. “You’ve got it _bad_ , buddy.”

“He’s just a friend though!” Hyunjin said.

“If he’s just a friend, then why did you ask for closure from me?” Chan tilted his head to one side. “It makes me think that you keep saying he’s just a friend because you’re afraid of committing to another relationship after what happened with ours. And I’m not going to ask if I’m right, because I know I am.”

“How?”

“Because I feel the exact same way.” Chan smiled. “Granted, my situation is… _way_ more pathetic, but I feel the same way, Hyunjin.”

“What’s your situation, then?” Hyunjin arched an eyebrow.

Chan sighed. “Well, it’s not very extensive. It started about, let’s see—” he checked his watch. “Seven hours ago. Yep. Seven hours ago.”

When Hyunjin frowned, Chan just grinned.

“You’re going to call me crazy,” Chan said.

Hyunjin snorted and rolled his eyes. “I can handle crazy, trust me.”

“For some reason, I believe you.” Chan smirked, then sighed and said, “I met someone. For a brief moment this morning. I don’t even know how to explain it other than the fact that he just felt familiar. I looked at him and just felt something deep in my gut and there was this nagging in the back of my mind. Almost like I’d seen him before, but I know I haven’t.” He sighed and rubbed at his eyes. “I sound so insane, but I felt a connection. I felt that spark. I felt like I _knew him_.”

Hyunjin should laugh at him. Write Chan off as crazy, as desperate. But he couldn’t. Because he had felt the exact same way when he first met Jeongin.

“I want to see him again more than anything, but something tells me that that’s not going to happen.” Chan sighed, looking absolutely miserable as he stared down at the table. “Honestly that’s the part that kills me more than anything. He’s a tourist, anyways. He’ll be gone within a week.”

“You never know,” Hyunjin said weakly. “Life can be crazy.”

“Yeah.” Chan didn’t look convinced, though.

“I’m sorry, Chan.” And Hyunjin meant it. Even if he and Chan didn’t end up together, he still wanted the best for him. He still wanted Chan to be happy. And he knew Chan wanted the same for him.

Chan just shrugged, then took a deep breath and forced a smile. “Damn, that got really depressing really quickly, huh?”

Hyunjin gave a half-smile that wasn’t genuine at all. “I get it, though.”

“You shouldn’t waste time clinging to this fear about ‘just being friends,’” Chan said suddenly, pointing at Hyunjin. “If you think you might love him, just go for it. Maybe it’s meant to be. And if it doesn’t work out, well, if your friendship really is as strong as you say, then you’ll be able to get through it and be friends again. Trust me, it can happen. Just…don’t let fear hold you back. Seriously. You’ll waste so much time and regret it.”

Hyunjin nodded, and that seemed to satisfy Chan.

“What’s his name, anyways?” Chan asked.

“Jeongin,” Hyunjin said, unable to stop himself from smiling a little at the sound of it. At the face and soul that went with it.

“He sounds cute,” Chan said.

“He is,” Hyunjin said. “What about you? Did you get a name from your mysterious stranger?” He quirked an eyebrow playfully.

Chan snorted. “I wish I got a last name so I could at least try to _find_ him, but I just got a first name. His name’s Woojin.”

Hyunjin’s smile dropped from his face. “Wait, _Woojin_?”

“Yeah?” Chan blinked at him.

“Woojin,” Hyunjin repeated, his eyes boring into Chan. “You sure he said his name was _Woojin_ and not something else? Not—I don’t know, William or something? Woo Jim or something?”

Chan arched an eyebrow as he said, “I’m not _deaf_ , Hyunjin. He said his name very clearly.”

“Okay, what did he look like?” Hyunjin’s heart was beginning to pound. “Average height, blue hair, tan skin, kind of looked like a god? Or a teddy bear? Kinda looked cuddly but also like he could beat the shit out of you without hesitation?”

Chan was starting to look a bit disturbed and concerned. “That’s an oddly specific description, but yes. To all of that.”

“Holy fucking shit,” Hyunjin said, sitting back in his chair as he gaped at Chan in disbelief. “Holy _shit_. _You’re_ the person Woojin came all this way for? How the fuck…”

“Wait, you know him?” Chan sat forward, staring at Hyunjin intently. “You really know this guy?”

“Yeah, he’s the guy I came with!” Hyunjin said, throwing his hands up. “He’s the one who’s dying and trying to cross things off his bucket list!”

He realized what he said only after the pain and shock flashed across Chan’s face.

“He…what?” Chan stared at him. “He’s…he’s dying?”

Hyunjin wouldn’t call himself a liar, per se, but in that moment, he considered lying to Chan’s face, just so he could ease his worries. Chan had already had such a difficult time, why crush the one hope he had?

But letting him believe that he could truly see Woojin again in the future would just be cruel. He had to tell him the truth.

“Yes,” Hyunjin said in a small voice. “He’s dying.”

Chan looked completely devastated, like he’d had the air knocked out of him as he sat back heavily. His eyes were distant and so full of a myriad of emotions as he stared down at the table.

Hyunjin wished he could take back everything he said.

“Chan,” he said, reaching out to take Chan’s hand. He gave it a reassuring squeeze. “I’m so sorry.”

Chan just shook his head. “It’s stupid, honestly. That I’m so worked up all of a sudden over someone I barely had a two-minute conversation with.” He shook his head again, squeezing his eyes shut.

“It’s not stupid,” Hyunjin said.

When Chan didn’t reply, Hyunjin sighed, trying to think of a way to solve this. An idea popped into his head.

“Do you want to see him again?” Hyunjin asked.

Chan’s eyes snapped up to his instantly. “More than anything.”

“I can take you to him,” Hyunjin said.

“Really?” Chan’s eyes widened. He instantly looked younger than he had a few minutes ago, now that he was full of hope again.

Hyunjin nodded and smiled. “Really. It’s the least I can do. I think you guys deserve a little more than a two-minute conversation.”

“You would do that for me?”

Hyunjin couldn’t help snorting and looking at Chan like he was crazy. “Of course, Chan. You said earlier that you still care about me. I care about you too. I want you to be happy.”

“Even if it’s just for a short time,” Chan said with a sigh.

“Even then,” Hyunjin agreed. “We can go today after you’re done with work.”

Chan smiled gratefully at him. “Thank you, Jinnie,” he whispered, squeezing Hyunjin’s hand.

Hyunjin just smiled and squeezed his hand back. “Anytime, Channie.”

He could only hope that Woojin wouldn’t kill him for this.

*

Later that day, Jeongin, Woojin, and Felix were sitting on the beach, watching the sun set, when Felix’s phone dinged.

“Oh, hey,” Felix said with a smile as he checked the message he had gotten. “Hyunjin’s asking where we are. Guess he finally finished up whatever he needed to do and wants to finally hang out again!”

Jeongin snorted at that and glanced at Woojin, who had a pleasant expression on his face as he watched the sun set. It had been a good day, in Jeongin’s opinion, even though he kept glancing at Woojin throughout it all and as a result barely paid attention to all the sights Australia had to offer. Woojin never looked exhausted or sickly or sad, but it was possible that he was deliberately hiding his expressions from Jeongin. Jeongin still wanted to ask Woojin about Chan, though he wasn’t sure when the right time was.

But since it was later in the day, Jeongin decided to take a chance.

“Did you have a good day, Woojin?” he asked with a smile.

Woojin looked at him, a smile on his face, and nodded. “I did.”

“Did you ever get to see that person you came all this way for?”

Woojin’s smile faltered for a split second before he looked out at the sunset again. “I did.” His voice was noticeably less enthusiastic this time.

“And?” Jeongin looked at him hopefully.

Woojin sighed and didn’t answer right away. When he did, his voice was soft and full of sadness. “There’s nothing to say about it.”

“Who was it?” Felix asked.

“No one you would know,” Woojin said.

“Okay, but could you tell us who this person was to you? You don’t have to give a name. Just…tell us your story, I guess.” Felix looked at Jeongin for help, and Jeongin nodded enthusiastically.

“Please,” Jeongin added.

Woojin sighed and looked down at his hands. Felix and Jeongin kept looking at him, as if their intense stares would get Woojin to give in.

“I met him over a decade ago,” Woojin said, looking up at the sunset again. “He was one of the first people I met after I figured out how to shift from a bear to a man. We didn’t meet here. We met in a library, back home.” He smiled faintly at the memory. “Somehow we had the same tastes in literature and were always checking out the same books at the same time. Except, the library was small and only had one copy of everything we were looking for. We often fought over who got the copy first.”

“Whoa, what?” Felix grinned. “Woojin fighting a cute stranger over a _book_? What a rebel.”

Woojin snorted and rolled his eyes, now looking more amused than sad. “Yes, yes, I was very rebellious in my youth.”

“You aren’t even that old,” Jeongin retorted.

“Quiet, your elder is speaking.” Woojin waved him off.

Felix and Jeongin rolled their eyes at the same time.

“Anyways, eventually we both grew tired of this situation and it ended with him asking me out for coffee,” Woojin continued.

“Aww,” Felix said, grinning.

“And the rest is history, I suppose.” Woojin smirked.

“Whoa, whoa, hang on!” Jeongin protested at the same time Felix said in a louder, more annoyed tone, “ _Awwwww_!!”

“You can’t just tell us half of the story,” Jeongin said. “What happened after that? Why aren’t you together now?”

Woojin sighed again, his face falling once again. “He found out who—or what—I was.”

“And he left?” Felix’s eyes were wide and shocked, while Jeongin had gone rigid.

“I wish he had,” Woojin said. “It would have been much easier.” He was silent for a few moments, during which he closed his eyes tightly. “He…he found out what I was and wanted to understand better. So he made a wish, without even realizing that a shooting star was passing by.”

“It wasn’t me,” Felix said when Jeongin looked at him. “I swear. I was still out by the Kuiper Belt.”

“No, I know it wasn’t you,” Woojin said softly, bringing their attention back. “I don’t know who it was and honestly I don’t care. It doesn’t matter now. The point is, the shooting star granted his wish. Granted him all the knowledge of the beings in the Celestial Sphere and beyond. Humans are not meant to have that much knowledge. It tore his mind apart.”

Felix and Jeongin stared at him, their jaws dropped, their eyes now wide with horror.

“He would have been beyond saving if I hadn’t found out when I did,” Woojin continued. “I had to find a way to erase that all from his memory. I was desperate, so I reached out to any Celestial being passing by. It just so happened to be one of the darker shooting stars, the ones who only grant wishes for something in return.” He paused, his eyes distant. “I didn’t realize that until after it was already done. The dark star took all of his memories pertaining towards the Celestial Sphere and beyond—including memories of me.”

Felix covered his mouth with his hand. Meanwhile, Jeongin just sat there, staring at Woojin with wide eyes.

“It did save him,” Woojin said, shrugging. “That’s all that matters in the end.”

“Woojin…” Felix began, when a new voice cut into their conversation.

“Jeongin!” Hyunjin’s voice rang out across the beach. Jeongin turned around to find Hyunjin heading towards them, someone else trailing behind him. He was smiling, so that was a good sign.

Jeongin smiled and stood up. “Where have you been? We missed you today.”

“Just doing—stuff.” Hyunjin shrugged it off as he smiled at him. He looked different. Happier. Like some weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Jeongin immediately thought of Woojin’s story and suddenly had an irrational fear that Hyunjin had made a deal with some dark star. It made him stare at him with concern.

“Actually, I’ll be honest,” Hyunjin said. “I went to see a friend. And he wanted to meet you guys, so—Jeongin, Felix, Woojin, meet my friend Chan.”

He smiled and gestured to the person hanging back, and Jeongin felt his good mood plummet.

Chan. Dr. Bang Chan. Jeongin really had mixed feelings about this guy, but right now he just felt a sense of betrayal. Did Hyunjin really only agree to come all this way because of Chan? He didn’t come because he wanted to be there for Jeongin or spend time with Jeongin or even be there for Felix and Woojin. No, he came just so he could fix things with Chan and get back with him. Jeongin felt like crying again.

“Nice to meet you, Chan,” Felix said, smiling and stepping forward to shake Chan’s hand. “I’m Felix!”

“Nice to meet you too,” Chan said, smiling back and shaking Felix’s hand. To Jeongin, he said, “And you must be Jeongin.”

Why was he smiling at him like that? Jeongin gave him a wary look and didn’t bother shaking his hand. “I know who you are.”

Chan blinked in surprise at Jeongin’s rude reaction to him while Hyunjin’s eyes went wide as though he just remembered something. But Chan covered it up by smiling at Jeongin and saying, “Well, I know who you are too.”

Jeongin frowned at that, but Chan was already turning to look at Woojin. Woojin had gotten up from where he was sitting on the sand and was now staring at Chan with a look of horror.

“Hi,” Chan said quietly. “Remember me?” He gave a little laugh.

“How could I forget?” Woojin’s voice was hoarse.

“I hope this isn’t me overstepping any line.” Chan stepped forward, while Hyunjin, Jeongin, and Felix all stepped to the side, all of them watching the two of them with wide eyes. “I just…I heard you don’t have much time left.”

Woojin swallowed and looked away. “It’s true.”

Chan’s face flashed with pain. “Why didn’t you say anything, love?”

Woojin’s eyes snapped up to his at that, while Chan’s eyes went wide.

“I didn’t mean to say that,” he said quickly. “It just came out. I’ve never called anyone that, I don’t know why I just—” he cut himself off as he stared deeply into Woojin’s eyes. His brow furrowed. “Your eyes look like they have stars in them.”

Woojin was now beginning to look more worried and horrified than anything, and Chan wasn’t looking away from him. He just kept staring, like he was getting lost in Woojin’s eyes and finding something there. He hadn’t done that at all this morning. The color was rapidly fading from his face.

“Stars,” Chan said. “There’s so many stars—”

Woojin reacted so quickly that it made the other three jump. He lunged forward and slapped his hands over Chan’s eyes, for once looking absolutely terrified.

“Don’t look!” Woojin exclaimed. “Don’t look, Chan.”

“Woojin?” Felix asked in a small voice, his eyes wide.

“He can’t,” Woojin exclaimed. “He can’t look. It’ll trigger it and he’ll—”

“I _do_ know you!” Chan interrupted. He made no attempt to remove Woojin’s hand from his eyes and reached out for Woojin instead. Woojin at first moved away from Chan’s hand, his face flashing with pain, though he kept his other hand firmly over Chan’s eyes. But when Chan kept reaching for him, he finally just took Chan’s hand and held it. “We’ve met before, I’m not crazy—”

“You’re not,” Woojin said sadly. “You’re not crazy. We have met before.”

Chan exhaled in relief, while Felix and Hyunjin looked thoroughly confused.

“You’ve met before today?” Hyunjin asked. “How?”

Woojin just shook his head, his eyes so sad as he looked at Chan, who still wasn’t doing anything to shove his hand away.

“Why can’t I look at you?” Chan asked instead.

“It’ll trigger it,” Woojin said. “I don’t know how or why, but looking me in the eye for longer than a few moments will trigger it.”

“Trigger what? The memories? I keep seeing flashes. I can see stars and you and me—I remember you. I remember you, Woojin.”

Woojin’s eyes were filling with tears. He had to swallow them back before answering, and even then, his voice was hoarse. “You’ll remember all of it if you look again.”

“What’s so bad about that?” Chan asked. “I want to remember you.”

“Your mind can’t take it, Chan. You don’t remember me because I had to wipe your memories. To save you. You asked for more than you could handle.”

“But I never really forgot you,” Chan insisted. “This morning—I _knew_ you. I could feel it. You’re the one I’ve been looking for my whole life.”

Woojin didn’t respond to that, mostly because the tears were finally slipping from his eyes. He grimaced, this time partially doubling-over from the pain. It was enough to make Jeongin take a step forward.

“Say something,” Chan whispered.

“I’m sorry,” Woojin said, his voice taut with pain. “I didn’t want it to end this way. I don’t know what to do.” He winced again, this time releasing Chan’s hand so he could press his hand to his chest.

“Woojin,” Jeongin said, taking another step forward.

“I’m fine,” Woojin said, but his voice and face said otherwise. “It just hurts every now and then, that’s all.”

“What does?” Felix asked when Woojin cried out and crumpled to the ground. He dropped his hand from Chan’s face. That seemed to break the ice, causing both Felix and Jeongin to run forward.

Chan blinked in surprise at the sudden change but took one look at Woojin on the ground and rushed towards him.

“No!” Woojin held out a hand to stop him, his face deliberately turned away. “Don’t look! Don’t look, Chan!”

Chan opened his mouth to protest, but then Hyunjin was there to cover his eyes with his hands. This time Chan resisted, trying to shove Hyunjin away, but Hyunjin stood his ground and even held the back of Chan’s head to keep his other hand in place. Chan gave up and instead asked in panic and frustration, “What’s going on?”

“It’s just a little pain, right?” Jeongin asked Woojin in a small voice. “Like when you fell and hit your head. Right?”

Woojin looked at him sadly. The look in his eyes said everything.

“No,” Jeongin said in a small, broken voice. “No, Woojin—”

“It’s okay, Innie,” Woojin said.

“You said you had a couple of _weeks—_ ”

“Things change,” Felix said softly. “It’s just how life works.”

Jeongin just stared down at Woojin, who gave him a sad smile.

“Felix is right,” Woojin said. “Things change. But that doesn’t mean I’ll be gone forever. I’ll still be up there, watching over you.”

Felix’s eyes widened at that. “Wait, you mean—?”

“What?” Jeongin looked in between the two of them, completely confused.

“It means I’m not saying goodbye,” Woojin said, smiling at him. “Just, see you later. That’s all. You’ll be okay. And, if you want, you can always come visit me up there.”

Jeongin was really sick of crying, but he couldn’t even stop the tears from falling this time. Woojin just smiled sadly at him and pulled his head down a bit so he could kiss his forehead. Then he wiped away some of Jeongin’s tears with his thumbs and said, “I love you—you know that, right?”

“I know,” Jeongin said, giving a small smile. “I love you too.”

Woojin smiled back before looking at Felix, who looked like he was holding back his tears to the best of his ability. The moment Woojin looked at him, though, he burst into tears and threw his arms around Woojin.

“I’ll miss you,” he said. “I’ll miss you so much—”

Woojin just smiled and hugged Felix back tightly. They stayed like that for several moments. When Felix finally pulled back, he was still crying, but he was smiling now too.

“See you later, Woojin,” Felix said.

“See you later, Lixie,” Woojin said.

Felix just nodded and looked away, still sniffing and wiping at his eyes and then squeezing his eyes shut.

“Can you help me up?” Woojin asked Jeongin.

Jeongin nodded and quickly helped Woojin back to his feet, even if Woojin’s face twisted with pain at having to move.

It was at that moment that Chan decided he had had enough and smacked Hyunjin’s hand away. Hyunjin jumped in surprise, and Chan took the opportunity to lunge forward, to Woojin.

“Chan—” Woojin started, fear flashing in his eyes.

“Take me with you,” Chan said, staring unflinchingly into Woojin’s eyes as he took Woojin’s face in his hands. “Please. I don’t want to live a second without you anymore.”

Woojin looked doubtful right before he tried to look away, but Chan tightened his grip and forced Woojin to look back at him.

“You can’t,” Woojin whispered, now trying to reach up and cover Chan’s eyes. “You can’t, you’ll—”

“If a constellation can become human, then a human can become a constellation,” Chan said. He stopped Woojin’s hand by taking it and intertwining their fingers, which he then held up against his chest. “I can handle it. For you.”

“You can always wish,” Felix said weakly.

Woojin’s eyes went wide at that, probably remembering the last time Chan made a wish on a shooting star. Felix realized that, because he added, “It’ll be okay, Woojin. Trust me.”

“You deserve to be happy,” Jeongin said.

Woojin still looked skeptical and worried. He lifted his eyes back to Chan’s, who was starting to tremble from the memories beginning to surge back into him. He clenched his jaw and stared back, though. It was probably because of that that Woojin smiled sadly and said, “I wish I could take you with me, so we could be together like we always wanted.”

Chan smiled at that. It was shaky, but Woojin smiled back.

Felix smiled too, though there were tears streaking down his face again as he said, “I’ll grant your wish.”

Right as he snapped his fingers, Chan leaned forward and kissed Woojin. They began to glow the moment their lips touched, and that glow only grew brighter and brighter, until everyone else had to shield their eyes or look away. Jeongin still tried to watch through his fingers, and he saw Chan pull away and say something to Woojin. Whatever he said made Woojin’s face light up with a smile, right before the brightness became too much to bear. Jeongin wanted to stare, to get one last look at the two of them before they were gone, but he closed his eyes against the light instinctively. A second later, the light vanished, leaving them with nothing but darkness and silence.

Jeongin opened his eyes, blinking away the lingering blindness. Woojin and Chan were gone. He looked at Felix, who was still wiping away his tears, but paused long enough to smile at Jeongin. Jeongin smiled back before looking at Hyunjin, who was currently looking in the opposite direction.

“Wow,” Hyunjin said with a snort of disbelief. “Knocked out the power of the whole city.”

Both Jeongin and Felix looked to find that the city had, in fact, lost power. But fortunately for them, that meant the stars were even brighter.

“We can’t see them from here,” Felix said, looking up at the sky with a sad smile. “We’ll have to wait until we get home.”

Jeongin nodded. He supposed he should feel like crying again. After all, he really had just lost Woojin. But perhaps it was because Woojin wasn’t really, truly gone that he didn’t feel an overwhelming surge of grief. He just felt…happy. For Woojin. Happy that Woojin had finally found what he was looking for, that he could finally find happiness and peace.

He sensed movement beside him and looked to see Hyunjin standing next to him. Hyunjin smiled at him before taking Jeongin’s hand and lacing their fingers together.

“Are you okay?” Hyunjin asked.

Jeongin blinked at him for a few moments. Was he okay? He wasn’t entirely sure. So he said, “I think so. But I’m not sure.”

“That’s okay,” Hyunjin said. “It’s okay if you’re not sure. It’s even okay if you’re not okay in a few hours or a few days or even a few weeks. I’ll be here for you.”

“You’ll stay with me?”

“I’ll stay.” Hyunjin smiled at him before leaning forward and kissing him on the forehead.

Jeongin supposed he should feel electric after that simple kiss. But he had to remind himself that it wasn’t anything other than platonic. It made his heart sink a little, but he decided that maybe just being friends was okay. As long as he had Hyunjin in his life, he’d be okay. So he smiled anyways.

Felix cleared his throat, making both of them look at him. He was smirking at them. “Not to break this up, but maybe we should get back to the hotel. It’s been a long day and frankly I think I want to go home tomorrow. I need to be around my own boyfriend so I don’t feel like I’m eternally third-wheeling on everybody.”

Hyunjin blushed at that, already opening his mouth to say his usual words, but Jeongin beat him to it.

“You’re not _third-wheeling_ ,” Jeongin said, stepping forward to take Felix’s hand. He smiled. “We’re all just friends. Right, Hyunjin?”

Hyunjin hesitated before saying, a bit dejectedly, “Right. Just friends.”

Jeongin smiled and nodded at that. Hyunjin managed a small smile in return but then quickly looked away.

“Alright, well, let’s get back.” Felix tugged Jeongin’s hand, and the three of them started to walk across the sand, all holding hands like they were elementary schoolers. “I could use a nap after that. It’s not easy turning humans back into constellations, lemme tell ya.”

“You did great, Lixie,” Jeongin said, smiling. “I’ll miss Woojin, but I’m glad he’s happy.”

Felix smiled back at him. “Yeah, me too. But at least we still got each other. We’ll figure out what to do with the bookstore and stuff together. Not until we get back home, though. And not until after I see my Seungminnie. And of course not until _after_ I’ve recovered from my jet lag. I need to be completely well-rested to discuss all of _that_. So…we’ll talk about it next week.”

Jeongin snorted at that. “Okay, Lix.”

Since the power was down, the keycards in the hotel didn’t quite work. They had to track down some of the hotel staff to unlock the doors for them with actual keys instead. And even then, they really only needed one of the doors open long enough for Felix to grab all of his and Woojin’s things and take it all to Jeongin and Hyunjin’s room. Jeongin and Felix shared a bed, since they all knew none of them wanted to sleep in a room alone.

That night, though, right after Hyunjin and Jeongin had gotten ready for bed, and Felix was already passed out in his bed, Hyunjin pulled Jeongin aside.

“Can we talk?” he asked.

“About what? Chan and Woojin?” Jeongin blinked up at him.

Hyunjin shrugged, already fidgeting and staring down at his hands. “Yeah, it’s about Chan, actually. I—”

“I know what you’re going to say,” Jeongin said.

Hyunjin’s eyes widened. “You do?”

Jeongin nodded. “I get that part of the reason you came on this trip was to go see Chan. You’re still in love with him, I know. And I know that’s part of the reason you can’t love me in that way. But that’s okay, Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin just blinked at him, too caught off-guard to formulate a proper response. “I…it is?”

Jeongin nodded. “I’m fine with us just being friends. I think after seeing Chan and Woojin, I’ve realized that the people who are meant to be will just… _be_. They’ll find each other, even against great odds like that. So, I think, if anything, this is telling us that we’re just supposed to be friends and that we’ll find the ones we’re meant to be with in the end.” He smiled.

Hyunjin just stared at him. Jeongin couldn’t quite read the expression on his face—he only recognized shock, confusion, and a bit of pain. Jeongin didn’t understand it. Shouldn’t Hyunjin be relieved?

Finally, though, Hyunjin smiled and nodded, even though that smile didn’t reach his eyes. His eyes looked pained. “Okay. Yeah. You’re right. Friends. Like we’ve been all along.”

“Right,” Jeongin smiled and nodded, then exhaled. “Phew, I’m glad we’re finally over with that, huh? It’ll save us a lot of heartbreak in the future. Let’s go to bed.” He patted Hyunjin on the shoulder and walked away. Even though it still stung a bit, he felt lighter. Like he could finally just…move on.

He didn’t even see the heartbroken expression on Hyunjin’s face when he walked away.

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo…that was rough. Honestly idk if I should have just ended this series with Part Two. Is this just being drawn out and should it end sooner than later? Or do you guys want two more parts? Let me know what you think. 
> 
> Also, disclaimer: this is all fiction. Please don’t assume based on this series that romantic love is a cure-all for mental health issues. I know that’s how I wrote it and how our media portrays love but like…don’t take that seriously please. It’s just a story.
> 
> But if you’re still here, thanks for reading!


End file.
